I wonder if part of your problem lies in your own words "nobody wants to go out and have a good time any more". I'm not sure what that has to do with love which is an ongoing deep friendshop and contentment, usually with somebody with whom you have a lot in common, or with whom you are compatible. Going out and "having fun" is OK for young people with no financial or family commitments but once a new relationship starts to mature people usually tend to settle of the routine contentment of making a home together. You're not being a "jerk" simply because you make the first move. Somebody has to, but possibly all the girls you would like to have dated have wanted to move on emotionally rather than spending their leisure hours in pubs or clubs, if that is where you have been looking to find somebody.