Will he cheat?

[Monkey2007]

I'm really worried because a new manager has just started where I work and she flirts with my partner a lot.

We are engaged and we work together. He's one of the managers and unfortunatly this new manager is the one who works closest with him. Everything has been fine till now and I normally trust him but in this case I just feel really threatened. Maybe I'm being really silly but he flirts back and I sure he likes her. I love him so much and I'm really afraid he's going to fall for her. I don't doubt that if she gets the chance she will go for it. I'm happier now than I've ever been and I don't want this to fall apart. What would you do?

[Coffeeman7]

I'm sure theres nothing to worry about. At least he won't be able to say hes "working late". Trust him, just be vigilant of her movements.

[hotpink]

if you have a very trusting relationship, and neither of you has cheated in the past, then i'm sure it will be ok. i can understand why you feel threatened, i'm sure all women have felt the same at some point. it can be difficult because as you aren't one of the managers, there will be a lot of private meetings, and a they will be spending a lot of time together. if she is flirting more with your partner than anyone else, make it clear to her how serious you both are about each other. the silly cow probably just needs a good sh*g... well she'll have to get it elsewhere wont she?!

[cazzz1975]

he may be just being friendly, when you feel threatened its very easy to read into every sign and gesture, put your faith in him, dont give him a hard time.

If he is worth his salt he will put a dampener on her flirting . Obviously if she has just started he wont want to upset her.

give it time, keep an eye on her but dont start accusing him of stuff!

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, i think maybe you need to have a chat with your hubby to be. Tell him that it upsets you that she keeps flirting with him.
I think your right to be worried as she is no doubtadely trying to seduce him and maybe she will be successful one day.
It could be when you 2 have just had a falling out or maybe when she gets him alone. He might be vulnerable one day too and give in to his temptation.
It makes it harder for you as you both seem to work in the same place so your mind will play tricks on you.
I think the only way you can ease your worry is for him to try and find a job elsewhere.
I know it sounds harsh, but your only gonna get worse. Especially when he ends up being alone with her or she starts paying even more attention to her.
If your relationship is strong he shouldnt fall for her flirts, but coming from a guys point of view, it is really hard to hold off to temptation when the persisitence is there and there every day...

[Petal~flower]

MrBen5, I bet Monkey feels so much better for your reply. So what if she and her boyfriend have a fight, or he gets in a huff. Does that make it ok for him to go and have an affair with this woman?

You sound a very weak willed man. No wonder you are single

[Slooow_Jo]

You need to talk to your man, I had a situation recently with my bloke & his female best friend it wasn't that I didn't trust them but something made me uncomfortable but he hadn't even seen things from my point of view till I told him> If your man is just being a harmless flirt back to this woman he will take on board what your saying & hopefully keep this woman at arms length from now...but if he goes all defensive that be on guard n sharpen ya nails to stratch their bloody eyes out I am only half joking honest!! ;)

& can I just add me & my bloke were together & almost married till we split 8 years ago & only recently got back together...but when we were together last time although I trusted him with my life I had an uncontrolable jealousy about a certain female who use to hang around him all the time I knew in my heart that he wouldn't have done anything with her but it was just something about 'her' that wound me up :-( even now after 8 years just the mention of 'her' name has me steaming at the ears so be warned...it WONT just go away :-( speak to your man & your'll be so much better for it xx

Good luck & try & let us know how it goes x

[fizzyBee]

Hey. As you are working together, I think it will be very hard for anything to happen and because you are always there the idea isn't likely to cross his mind. However the same can't be said for her. I would really keep an eye on her. If things start looking bad and you have a chat ith him it hopefully would scare him anyway if he was thinking about it.

In my past I've been with a few attached guys - not something I'm proud of or would ever do again, but I know that if a woman is persistant enough she can normally have any man but it's never usually more than sex. They get what they can but never usually leave their partners. You've just got to be smart and keep and eye on things.

[garry745]

Got to agree with Slooow_Jo and that you need to talk to him and convey your feelings about this woman. Express yourself clearly about how insecure it makes you feel and say about all your concerns.

Don't think it's uncommon in a relationship for one partner to be behaving in a certain manner, blissfully unaware of the effect it's having on the other. Once it's out in the open, then normal people will take on board what is said and react accordingly in a positive way.

If you have your say and he continues to disregard your feelings, then you can make your own choices.

[Monkey2007]

Thanks for all your relpies. They've been a big help. I think that he is quite innocent at the moment but I'm worried that if she's persistant he will fall for her. I haven't mentioned it yet to him. I wanted to wait to see if it would get any better because she hasn't been there long and I'm worried that if there is ever a problem with her in the future he will tell me it's just because I'm jealous of her. It makes me feel sick every time he talks about her.