help!

[bobtheturkey]

last night i went my weekly bowling match with mrs F who is the sister of the woman i was playing pairs with mrs D, now mrs D and my postmans cousin mr X is the ex husband of a woman who works part time in superdrug mrs G now mrs G was meant to play mixed pairs with mr O who it turns out is the brother of Mrs F who use to be the home help of a mr U who it turns out used to play bowls and was once disqualified for allowing his white flannel trousers to split while playing a delicate shot in the greater belfast over 92s pairs in 1998 allowing mrs F my partner to win could i be accused of bias?

[China Doll]

Dejavu...

The butler did it in the library with the candlestick.

[cazzz1975]

its hard to get skid marks out of white flannel trousers

[DottyH]

There is a Greater Belfast???????

[bobtheturkey]

yes its just a fancy name for it

[MrBen5]

I only read the first sentence then got bored again.
Did you win?

[bobtheturkey]

match abandoned a pigeon flew over and did its business on the bowls

[DottyH]

that would be lucky in Wigan

[pussnboots]

LOL tears rolling down face, luv it.

[MrBen5]

Are you sure it was a pigeon?
I hear that a guy had escaped from a mental prison in a hot air balloon and was apparently ejaculating on the people below...

[Beads]

You pee taker!! ho ho
Beads
(nee nuoyg)

[DottyH]

Mt ben are you implying that people from NI cannot tell the difference between a pigeon and a wa*****

[bobtheturkey]

i suppose its possible mr b i might take it the lab for analysis i put it in a nearby empty marmalade jar

[cazzz1975]

yeah it was mr ben, he was on the payroll of mr u for revenge at his disqualification and subsequent appearance on the jeremy kyle shows "my father is a transvestite"

[helliebobs]

dot luck in Wigan is discovering the woman in Pooles has given you 3 pies and only charged you for 2 :)
bob, I'm intrigued by your comment that Mr U 'allowed' his trousers to split - are you suggesting he did this on purpose? Maybe to distract the opposition?

[MrBen5]

Ooohh, you must be rich Bob if you have marmalade and play bowls.
In fact that is your new name now RichBob...

[bobtheturkey]

thing is helliebobs he is a regulation 48 waist but insisted on squeezing into a 34 so the implication is there

[cazzz1975]

richbob splitpants

[helliebobs]

I see bob, in that case, I would agree, the rapscallion mr u thoroughly deserved to be disqualified.

[bowiefreak]

thank the lord B (Brenda) was not involved quack quack