Would you ask a new partner to have an aids

[sandrajo]

test before having sex with them? A mate of mine has just finished with her guy after 2 months as he wouldn't get a test for aids and any other STD! Good on her I say especially in this day and age, what do you think?

[weeal]

Isnt that a bit extreme? lol
I heard that if you'd had an AIDS test you were an insurance liability cos insurers assume that if youve taken the test then youve put yourself at risk and wouldnt insure you.
Would you take a battery of tests cos a bloke asked you to? I wouldnt.

[Ethel]

weeal - anyone can get the test done anonymously, so the insurance companies wouldn't know.

It only takes one intimate act with one person to get a very nasty disease - so good for her.

[4getmenot]

I havent done personally but each to their own and good on your mate. xx

[sqad617]

I am a bit confused......if you want him to take an Aids test or any other test for that matter, all he needed to say that yes he had taken the test and the results were negative. That I presume would satisfy you, but would not guarentee safety. Life, I am afraid is a bit of a lottery and you cannot paper over all the cracks. STDs affect all types, nice guys, well brought up guys, all classes but not of course celibate guys. If you dont want a sexual transmitted disease, then don't have intercourse.

[redcrx]

weeal, all pregnant women are offered AIDS testing as a matter of course, it will not affect insurance.

I think it would depend on the sexual history of the partner as to whether Id ask them to test, I know of someone who would regularly take a test themselves even though they werent a risk group.

[4getmenot]

sqad I;m sure she would ask for the written results

[Supernick]

I had a test recently (which isn't pleasant). I didn't have blood work done, but then I'm a blood doner, so they test for HIV anyway.

I did it because a girl I was seeing last year, up until July called about a month ago and said she had the dreaded warts. I had no symptoms, but thought it was worth getting tested to make 100% sure.
The point is, that I made certain judgement calls whilst I was seeing her. We didn't have sex for about 3 weeks from dating, and in that time I believed her to be educated, sensible and not very promiscuous. All of those things are still correct but she picked up an infection anyway. We never had unprotected sex, but were talking about her going on the pill after about 3 months together, and I would have been happy with that. I can't really imagine saying to someone at the start of a relationship,
"Do you mind having a full check up first and provide documentation that you're free from STI's?".

The tests came back clear by the way....

[Octavius]

sandrajo, what would you do/how would you feel if a man said that to you after a couple of dates?

[mandimoo]

it could be argued that if you are not comfortable enough to ask then you should be ready to sleep with them. however this is not how ive lived my love life!

[dustinmyeye]

this is difficult to answer because my initial responce was well good on her for being careful but then i thought how id feel if someone asked that of me and id be highly insulted.
fair enough be safe where sex is concerned but to that extent ?
would you get into a taxi and ask the drivers history and want to see his licence etc before you let him drive you anywhere?follow a chef into the toilet to make sure they washed their hands thoroughly?

[Octavius]

That was almost my point dustin. Good on her for thinking ahead, but if a man said that to any of the women here, I am quite convinced they would be offended as though they were assumed to be a promiscuous strumpet.

[LaceyMike]

I think your mate is being very responsible. If me and my partner split up and I met someone else I would most certainly ask them to be checked out and I would have no qualms about having myself checked if thats what they wanted. You don't know how many partners people have had in previous years. It's better to be safe than sorry!

[whiskeysheri]

I agree with LaceyMike.

If I was getting into a relationship with anyone, then I like to think I'd feel comfortable enought to ask them to just get checked out- and I'd do the same if they asked. I don't think it infers promiscuity; if I met a man who had slept with only one woman, I'd still ask. Who knows who his partner before had slept with and may have possibly caught.

[sqad617]

Of course STDs have been known for hundreds of years and were know as VD (Venereal Diseases). Many guys who would "put it about a bit" seemed to sidetrack the diseases as opposed to the guy on his stag night, egged on by his mates to "have a go" seemed to catch VD on his first outing so to speak. It was almost as if the serial philanderers built up an "immunity" There is no medical evidence to substantiate this. If the vicar had sigins of VD and tests were adviced, the indignant cry of "what on the vicar?" and the answer was " No, on the vicar's wife"
No idea what this has to do with the thread, so please indulge me.

[Supernick]

Really? After a few weeks of dating, thing get a little steamier and you ask for an STI check? I would expect any girl that I asked to be extremely offended. That would be the end of any relationship!!

[Ice.Maiden]

It seems a sensible idea, but I must admit that I'd be on the defensive if anyone asked me if I'd had tests, or if I'd be willing to.

[R1Geezer]

Jesus H Christ, I'm amazed he didn't dump the mad b1nt first. No rumpy pumpy for 2 months. I'm afraid girls the Geezer would be out there a lot quicker!

In normal sex it's virtually impossible for a bloke to get aids. Now if he's ploughing the chocolate highway, all bets off! She's been reading too much bandit propaganda.

[sandrajo]

Octavius; I don't think it would of crossed my mind but she's brought it to my attention now and I think I probably would. STD's are horrid things to catch and some can have devastating results, in the long run it's so much better to be safe than sorry.