Sad Story

[daffy654]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/hereford/wo rcs/7363537.stm

I know technically this should be in the News section but I am not asking a question about it. I just think this is the saddest story I have heard all year. Anyone who is a carer of a disabled child or adult will know exactly what I mean.

[Ice.Maiden]

Do we know what's happened yet?
As for the story itself, it's awful isn't it? I have a disabled child, and know from experience how it can effect you emotionally and physically.

[daffy654]

I am half expecting the two men who have been arrested for the murder of the son to be family members Ice.Maiden.
The poor mother must have been at the very end of her tether to do what she did!

[tiggerblue10]

Murders are always hard to comprehend but this just seems so much harder.

[leelapops]

What did the mother do? Was it suicide? Or planned? I don't understand this, really, despite having read a couple of articles on it.
Thanks x

[cazzz1975]

I dont want to read the news report as it really upset me :(

I happened upon it about an hour ago

[daffy654]

It seems the mother committed suicide but the son was murdered.Two men have been arrested for the murder of the son but they haven't been named yet.

[daffy654]

I have cried over it too cazz. I can imagine how the poor woman felt knowing that her son was never going to be able to live an independent life and that her life would be spent caring for him until the day she died.

[josie48]

Oh NO! I saw his face in the paper today and filled up. We think of our own dont we? Why?

[cazzz1975]

her son could be my son, in terms of development they are very similar, I could not imagine my son coming to deliberate harm :(

[Ice.Maiden]

It's too sad and dreadful. I don't think I'll be able to read about the story any more.

[josie48]

Yeh I know what you mean Ice. I worry about my Aspergers son just like any other mums of SN kids.

[daffy654]

We have no support in our area for carers so maybe it was the same for her.
I have just muddled along with my son mostly,I have never been offered any help other than the child development centre he attended until he started school. I had to fight to get him diagnosed and statemented,then fight for a place in a special school for him.He is now in mainstream school and due to start high school this year.
This government needs to wake up and realise what a stressful and valuable job carers do and help them to do it to the best of their ability with support services and respite in all areas of the country,not just the affluent ones.

[Ice.Maiden]

Daffy and josie - i can only say that I know where you're coming from. You can't begin to explain to parents of childtren with no SN, can you? Mine has autism with severe learning difficulties, but we sent him to a mainstream school so that he could be with friends and he wouldn't have to adapt to changes. Thankfully, he's coming on so brilliantly, I could cry when I think of how proud I am of him. His achievements are wonderful. the news story just upsets me though. Words can't describe how sorry i feel about the situation.

[josie48]

Too right Daffy, We should'nt have to fight for help for our kids. You must have been really stressed, I know I used to be when my son was being bullied and we fought to get him into another school. Seems like you had a harder fight on your hands!

[daffy654]

I wasn't as stressed once I had a diagnosis josie. Everyone kept saying that I shouldn't label my child and that him having the label of Asperger Syndrome would mean he would be treated differently.Well he is different! and should be treated according to his abilities or lack of. Once I knew what was wrong I could research the condition and know his limitations,thereby making his life easier. All children are precious whether they have learning or physical disabilities and I wish everyone would realise that.

[josie48]

Ice and Daffy, Of course you're proud Ice,Im the same. Maybe its because our "specials" have to work harder? My son is 23 and we call him our "Manchild",not to his face tho. Daffy your so right,no one understands,my MIL still wont accept my son is Aspie. She says its hormones,silly woman. Hormones since he 1st showed signs of autism at 3? LOL. Im really glad you're not as stressed these days Daffy. Ice tell your son to keep up the good work:-))

[cazzz1975]

because of my 2 sons autism we are always left out of family gatherings :(

[daffy654]

My son never gets invited to my fiance's family gatherings either Cazzz. It breaks my heart that most of them haven't taken the time to get to know him as he is a lovely well mannered boy.Much better manners than any of their brats anyway!lol.
My fiance's parents are great with him,its his 5 brothers and their wives that exclude us. I put it down to their ignorance of his condition and not knowing how to interact with him.

[daffy654]

Your boys are very lucky to have you cazzz! and josie and Icey and all other parents of children with learning disabilities,physical disabilities and illnesses.

[netibiza]

When I was a teacher I found autistic and children with other learning difficulties the sweetest and most loving of all the the kids (there were no special classes in those days!). Enjoy your special children.