How much affection do you need?

[liquidspace]

For those of you living with someone or married: How much affirmation do you need from your partner? Are you happy with a peck on the cheek when you see each other at the end of the day or do you want more, i.e. holding hands, sitting together. Are your needs fulfilled?

[lil75]

I need loads and so does my fella, a perfect match!

[B00]

Hardly any!

I'm not a kisser and cuddler, I love my own space too much and luckily Mr Boo is exactly the same. We know we love each other, no need for constant affirmations from each other. Infact It would get on my nerves if someone was constantly ' in my space'.

[CAJ1]

My needs are fulfilled now. My boyfriend used to give me the occassional hug and kiss but a lot of the time would joke about grabbing me instead of being affectionate. I told him to give me more hugs and now we have it just right. I'd say if you're not happy with the amount you have definitly speak up!

[daffy654]

I hold my fiance's hand when we are out (if i'm not in my wheelchair),but I can't stand to have him sitting next to me at home,I like my personal space so he has the sofa and I have a recliner chair.We do hug a lot and he is always grabbing my bum etc.He also phones me from work every lunchtime but that is more to do with checking that I am ok than anything else I think.We are always saying "I love you" to each other and our 11 year old son has picked up on this and does the same to us both. :-)

[B00]

You told him to give you more hugs??

But surely if he's not a natural hugger he's doing it just to please you? I can't think of anything more off putting- sorry.

[4getmenot]

cuddles every now and then, a kiss when he leaves for work, dont hold hands

[jno]

oh I dunno B00, the idea of someone doing they wouldn't normally, just to please me, is sweet.

[CAJ1]

He does hugs but I think I should be allowed to say if I want more hugs rather than grabbing (not that I mind the occassional one)! Sure I don't like doing his washing and ironing etc but I do it - you make sacrifices and do the odd thing your asked in relationships

[4getmenot]

yer I agree with BOO. if he wants to give you affection it should be of his own accord not forced on him. If I want more cuddles I just grab him

[CAJ1]

But is it not better to say when something isn't quite right or to your liking to improve things than to say nothing and get annoyed?? He even admitted that he knew he grabbed me too much!

[daffy654]

Is that from you or someone else though tetjam???

[snagged]

^^^ That's killed this thread lol

[andy-hughes]

I am not comfortable with affection except with my children. My youngest daughter has always been very physically demonstrative, and has done a lot to thaw out my mother-in-law who is quite cold emotionally.

My wife likes affection in private, she loves her feet stroked while we watch TV.

I think I am more affectionate than I allow myself to be - i grew up in a very confrontational family, so affection, verbal or physical was not expressed.

[4getmenot]

Neither really, maybe say you want a bit more but if he doesn�t change get rid, surely he�s the man you fell in love with how he was

[CAJ1]

Ah yes, but you're all polite to each other when you first meet and that changes when you know each other better and live together! If you needed a hug would you ask your other half for one or go without? I'm just asking because I'm thinking maybe I go about doing it the wrong way now lol!

[4getmenot]

Well I�d say my bloke knows when I need a hug so gives me one, or I cuddle up to him, if I have to ask him then there�s something wrong. Although in bned last night I said �cuddle me� It was blinking freezing :-)

[CAJ1]

Maybe that wasn't a good example because he knows to hug me when I'm upset lol! He was trying to hug me in bed last night and I told him (jokingly) to get off as he was freezing!

[4getmenot]

Caj am I right in thinking it was you that found something that made you think he was going to propose or was that another aber?

[CAJ1]

That was me. Not my birthday til November though