Keep Cardboard Happy Campaign

[natalie_1982]

What's everyone's favourit joke?

[natalie_1982]

9087, I still don't get it. Where's the soap? Wears the soap.

[georgit79]

Yes, I know she did, but why did she need two fannies?

[spamflag]

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its Colin.

[natalie_1982]

Phil and gary are fannies!

[spamflag]

Two elephants walk off a cliff.......... .......Boom Boom!

[natalie_1982]

Where is the bl00dy soap?

[9087]

Oh natalie, think about it!!

[natalie_1982]

David Beckham, the Queen, the Pope, a policeman and a school girl are on a plane. The plane is crashing and there are only 4 parachutes. The queen has one for being the queen, the pope has one for being the pope, DB says "As captain of England and a famous world figure, I should get a parachute too", and he also jumps. The Policeman looks at the schoolgirl and says "Well, you have your whole life ahead of you - I'm an older man, you have the last parachute", she replies "We can both go, DB took my rucksack".

[cardboard]

How do you make a bear cross? Nail two of them together

[natalie_1982]

I am thinking, I've asked the girls in my office they don't get it either!

[georgit79]

Oh right, I get it now! Now my last question looks so funny! (even if I do say so myself)

[cardboard]

An irishman goes for a job at some stables. The stableman asks "are you any good at shoeing horses?". The irishman replies "well, I once told a donkey to f*ck off"

[ICEMANSAV]

A piece of grey tarmac was talking to his brown coloured tarmac mate in the pub.

" I am well hard he says I have thousands of cars on my back all day long 24/7!"

" Nah" says the brown tarmac " I am they call me the hard shoulder and people feel safer on me!"

That moment a green piece of tarmac walks into the bar, and both the grey and brown tarmac run off and hide. After a quick drink the green piece of tarmac leaves and the other two come out.

Barman " Thought you two said you were hard!"

Grey tarmac " we are but that guy's a cyce-path!"

 

Poor I know!

[Ralph]

Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a drop of paint on their habits.

After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude. In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" calls one of the nuns.

"Blind man," replies a voice from the other side of the door.

The two nuns look at each other and shrug, and, deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door.
"Nice gazongas," says the man, "where do you want these blinds?"

[9087]

I've got work to do, but keep 'em coming. I manage to hit my 'refresh' key between patients...

[georgit79]

A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, thegirl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.

Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the chemist to get some condoms. The chemist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the till, the chemist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you tomeet my parents, come on in!"

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say graceand bows his head.

A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down.

10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a chemist."

 

Rubbish? Yes. Sorry!

[cardboard]

A man phones in work one day "sorry boss, I cant come to work today, Im sick". "You dont sound very bad", replies the boss, "Just how sick are you?". "Well, Im in bed with my sister...."

[crafty]

thats a class joke!

[ICEMANSAV]

Two nuns sitting on a bench when a streaker runs past. One had a stroke the other one couldn't reach.

[natalie_1982]

What do you call a Redneck virgin? A 9yr old who can run faster than hers brothers.