help ..

[1o2]

can doctors found out if you`ve had sex or not before?

[El D]

yes if you;re a girl but only with a detailed invasion of your privacy - in addition any such discovery would be covered by patient doctor confidentiality and noone else would have a right to know. If anyone is asking and you do not wish them to know there is no way for them to find out, explain to them that it is a private matter for yourself and would they please respect your decisions. noone has a right to know, even your parents, just remember that.

[j2buttonsw]

It used to be whether your hymen was intact but this is unreliable see http://www.coolnurse.com/hymen.htm

[KEJ2000]

The second answer is more correct. If a gynecologist sees that the hymen is 100% intact then the answer is clearly no.  But in every other instance, they cannot tell for sure.  A certain percentage of women are born without a hymen, they simply never had one there, so its absence wouldn't indicate anything for sure.  The only way a gynecologist can really tell is by asking you.  It seems unprofessional for them to do so, but what they are getting at is whether they need to provide you with education about preventing STDs.  Just tell them that you're not comfortable answering the question and assure them that you are not doing anything to risk your own health or anyone else's by way of STDs, assuming that you're *not* taking any risks!  If they persist, then find another gynecologist and report the first one for unethical behaviour. They should never harass you about it.

[KEJ2000]

Giving credit to the first answer here as well, it is true that any such information is covered by doctor-patient confidentiality.  Any doctor violating that policy could and would be sued, and they know that, and they don't want to be sued.  My sister is a medical doctor and has had teenaged girl patients, where the girls' mothers tried to ask my sister to reveal whether the girls were still virgins.  All doctors, including my sister, are very assertive about refusing to answer such questions and swiftly dealing with any mothers who even dare to ask.  Nosey mothers make my sister angrier than anything.  ...Besides, the mother could also be a lawyer who is only asking on the off-chance that the doctor will "spill" the secret and then be ripe for a HUGE lawsuit (and dismissal)... so doctors never, ever reveal anything, no matter what.

[El D]

well I never knew that so I stand corrected

[Hgrove]

I was interested to read the answers.  How does the confidentiality requirement square with the calls for doctors to tell parents if their daughters are pregnant?  (Something I disagree with).

[KEJ2000]

I don't believe that there will ever be a law requiring doctors to tell parents if their daughters are pregnant.  There may be calls for it, but there are calls for a lot of things, that go ignored by the sensible majority.  In some countries, there is a push for women under the age of 16 (or 18) to obtain written permission from a parent before obtaining an abortion.  Even in this case, the daughter would be the one to speak to her parents; it wouldn't be the doctor's responsibility or choice.  If the daughter wouldn't speak to her parents, then the doctor would simply refuse to perform the abortion, and that would be the end of that.  There would be no intervention on the part of the doctor to disclose any information to the parents, or to seek the approval of the parents on the daughter's behalf.  The doctor just wouldn't get involved in that manner.  They are only expected to do so much... they just basically stick to doing their procedures and refrain from acting as counselors.  If a patient needs a counselor rather than a doctor, then the doctor will refer her/him to another individual who is qualified as a counselor... but MDs are not qualified in that way.

[El D]

yes hopefully it will die down. imo this is mainly a thrust by the religious groups desperate to control their chilrens sexuality, picking up the odd scared middle class mother along the way.

if they want to know when their daughter is pregnant, I suggest they become better mothers.