Daughter showing signs of depression?

[HJT40]

I have noticed signs of depression in my 16 year old daughter and have done for a little while. I notice the signs because I suffer with it myself during the winter months and have just gone back on anti depressants.

Would you suggest taking her to the doctors, with the chance that she could be put on these tablets too, which I wouldn't want at such a young age.

Or could this just be a teenage thing?

[ummmm]

It could be a number of things. Have you spoke to her about it?

[andy-hughes]

It is more than likely the hell-on-earth that is female puberty.

Your own experience may make you extra sensitive to the apparent sings of your condition in others, which may or may not be well founded.

You should have a chat with your daughter, when you are both alone, and have some time. Ensure that there is nothing bothering her, and make sure that she knows that you are avalilable to talk to, with no judgements or rows, if she needs to 'unburden'.

She may not feel that you are the appropriate person in whom to confide - and that is not a problem - the problem is if she has no-0ne to turn to, that is when simple issues become complex in teenage minds.

Make sure you affirm her as a valuable person to you, and to the wider world, on a daily basis - just a simple "You're doing fine, and I love you ..." is all that's needed during this time when self-loathing is a daily occrence, together with peer pressure and shifting dynamics in friendships.

Keep an eye on her generally, and if you think she is actually slipping into depression, have a word with her Head Of Year at school. who may be able to offer additional support from that end as well.

[HJT40]

Umm, we do speak about things in general, but she admitted to me the other day, when I was aplogising for being a grump that she sometimes feels low too, but doesn't know why.

If I think about it I have had it since I was at school too, but just looked on as a moody cow!

Pinkilady, I find it such a hard thing to do knowing, as I do, that she is likely to be taking tablets on and off for a long time, as it is not a permanent cure.

[society]

It might just be a phase that she's going through. I'd not put my child on depression medication, especially at such a young age. Perhaps something is bothering her? Have you tried having a chat with her, and spending mum& daughter time alone with her? She might then confide in you.

[HJT40]

Thank you Andy. I am going to see her tutor at lunch time and may well mention it to him, he is so helpful.

[ummmm]

There is a big difference between being 'low' and being depressed. We all get low sometimes.

At 16 it could be hormones.

[milly143]

This may sound uncaring and I certainly don't wish it to but I wouldn't rush to get her to the doctors. It's not all that long since I was 16 and I remember times throughout all my teenage years when I felt miserable, for no apparant reason. As Andy said, you be more worried about her havin depression because you are more aware of the condition yourself but it could well be perfectly normal teenage angst.

[HJT40]

She can be very quite and shuts herself away, moody, tearful, up one minute, down the next, lacks self confidence Little things can be big problems to her and she doesn't know how to cope with them. There seems to be no middle ground with her.

[HJT40]

I do hope so Milly! I don't think I would want to be a teenager again.

[ummmm]

That sounds like loads of teenagers to be fair.

If I could get away with shutting myself away I would sometimes, I get moody and really really teary. Then I come on.

[tiggerblue10]

Maybe you are both prone to suffering from SAD. Light therapy may be useful.

http://www.sad.org.uk/

[Francis Asis]

I suffer with SAD and have a light therapy lamp. It's made a HUGE difference to my life. I would recommend it to anyone.

[pastafreak]

Just read this-and I agree about SAD also.
Anti depressants are not the way to go with it though.The same applies to your daughter. I'm a firm believer in talking about things,and letting her know that what she is experiencing is not something she is alone in. Since you now have a 'common ground'...let that serve as an opening for further talk and discussion,and sharing of feelings. You may need to look back to when you were her age.
Please do investigate SAD.....it can be quite debilitating for many. I started to feel low and weepy in October and felt unable to cope...getting plenty of sunshine and light-whether natural or not,helps immensely.

This may help... http://www.sada.org.uk/