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s100 | 17:35 Thu 27th Oct 2011 | Relationships & Dating
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basicly i have been with my boyfriend for three years im only 18 and this year i went on a girls holiday. I made guy mates on this holiday and they happened to live close to me back home, since this holiday my boyfriend has become soo parraniod he wont let me talk to them he dosent like me hanging around with my best friend because she is abit permiscuos he always brings up the holiday accusing me of cheating on him he has become annoyingly insecure and does not trust me with anything it has caused so many arguments but it is completely out of character for him to act like this. i love him soo much and i really dont want to lose him im just worried that it is going to push me away because i feel like i am becoming restricted wat shall i do ?
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I'd find another guy if I were you. Don't tie yourself up to a jealous man - it won't get any better.
Have you done anything before to make him doubt his trust in you? And it is expected that girly holidays there will be a few guys around wanted to get some holiday fun as well but if you are faithful to him then being friendly is not a problem. If he is this jealous for this then perhaps you shouldn't stay together as it will always be in the back of his mind that he thinks you've slept around a bit and probably lumps you in with your promiscuous friend. Either get him to sort his own insecurities out or look elsewhere!
People who don't trust often are like that because they know what they would be like (or actually did) with the same opportunity.

You would be surprised how often making accusations like this are the first sign of someone cheating.
S100 from your own addmission your only 18. Lack of trust is one of the biggest reasons couples break up. You have a long life ahead of you and no doubt a few more boyfriends before you find 'the one'. I know the one your with feels special, but jealously only brings arguments and unhappiness. I think a lot of female ABers and maybe male as well . Have experienced very similar romances and have been torn apart by making the right decision.
Yes, it will push you away from him, it already is, which is why you have posted this question. It is always hard to know the right time to break of a relationship, but the longer you leave it the worse it is and more the likelihood that it will end with strong resentment. What ever your decision, I wish you luck and happiness. xx
Sit down with him... tell him much as you love him you are not prepared to deal with his insecurity issues... nor will you allow him to dictate who you can or cannot include in your life... Point out to him you love him, and know that to betray him would be a terrible thing and you find the idea too horrible but he needs to get a grip on his feelings or the relationship will have no chance. Maybe he isn't right for you...but I'd give him a chance to think about it first... but I suspect a year or so down the line you will be posting... I have this lovely new guy... who cares for me and respects me...
I too started going out with my boyfriend when I was 15 and he developed major trust issues when we were around your age; I put up with it and persevered with reassuring him, making sure I never did anything to make him doubt me and put up with all sorts of accusations from him for nearly 3 years before he finally trusted me and although we have a great relationship now (we are 24 and 25 now) I wouldn't recommend anyone going through what I did, I was young and really naive to put up with it and definitely wouldn't do the same if those old issues started creeping back. Give him a chance and follow rowan's advice about having a talk with him but no matter how much you love each other without trust it is going to be a very difficult realtionship.

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