ChatterBank1 min ago
Can't Get Away
35 Answers
Following my divorce I started dating a guy who I realised (too late) has narcissistic tendencies. We stopped actually dating (his choice0 and he started seeing someone else. The problem is we get on really well as friends, he says I am his best friend. He rings, messages every day and wants to see me. When he has problems or is sick he comes to me. A lot of people think we are together as we get on so well. I don't like his girlfriend much she is a 'saccharin manipulator' all girly and helpless and not my cup of tea. I have tried on several occasions to walk away from him and remove him from my life but he just won't let me, gets very, very upset (either angry or tearful). It makes it difficult for me to move on and have a life of my own (although there is no-one on the horizon). The problem now is he has being diagnosed with a potentially terminal illness and he says he needs me more than ever, he says the girlfriend is upset and he can't cope with her but he still keeps on seeing her. I know he probably does need me, I'm calm and practical, but its a huge emotional investment when I do all the caring and worrying, to all intents and purposes a girlfriend/wife role but she is getting all the 'sympathy' and 'poor girl she's so upset'. I genuinely care about the guy, my head says I should walk away but heart says stay and look after him. As you can tell, I'm a bit confused! Any words of wisdom?
Answers
Best Answer
No best answer has yet been selected by Hellyon. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.
How can he bombard you if he is blocked on your phone? I have a theory that if we really want to do something, we get it done. If we don't want to do it we will always find reasons why we can't. This applies to me too by the way. So if you want to make the break and move on, the way to do it is to do it.
I actually know you are right woofgang. I did block him on my phone and facebook. He rang my landline, my friends and borrowed a phone to text me. I ended up giving up just for some peace.
And I'm very aware I sound stupid but it's not so easy putting it into practice. I was in the process of walking away again when this illness bombshell hit.
And I'm very aware I sound stupid but it's not so easy putting it into practice. I was in the process of walking away again when this illness bombshell hit.
if he is bothering your friends and borrowing phones to text you that's harassment. Tell him you will go to the police. You can get number display/blocking kit for your landline and it doesn't cost much. No its not easy, getting yourself out of a mess is never easy but i refer you to my previous statement. If you "can't" do it, there is a reason why you don't want to do it. If you really want to do it then you can. I know it sounds hard but that is the truth of the matter. So what do you really want?
