Ethical Dilemma

[david small]

Birthdays. my children, and also their partners birthdays. Should I give money each according to their needs, or, give equally to each?

[bhg481]

We give the same money to our daughter, her husband, their two sons(our grandsons) and their spouses. The two great grandchildren get much less.

[Peter Pedant]

for me it depends on the cash flow - and I tell them...

also depends on age - if they 6 ( no not mental age you naughty boy! mentally they will be always be stuck in single figures) then 5/- will do for a standard handout, with the  injunction - "spend it on sweeties!"

[Maydup]

Equal. If one of them needs a little financial support, you can always help them out away from birthdays. 

[davebro3]

A fiver each in the birthday card?

[david small]

£100 each to my kids. Their partners some of whom I dislike, what to give them without causing resentment?

[douglas9401]

A greeting on their Facebook page or a text message wishing them happy birthday and keep the hard-earned for yourself.

[Impatiens]

Exactly the same to all children, exactly the same, but, possibly a smaller amount than to children, to all partners, exactly the same to all grandchildren. I strive for parity!

 

[barry1010]

Save the stress and just give all the adults the same

[Cloverjo]

Daividsmall, I think give the same to all children and partners. 
 

Davebro, a fiver? I'm not sure whether you're joking or not. You might as well put a farthing in their card 🫤

[david small]

Thank you all for your response to my question.

[douglas9401]

Each according to their means.

[1ozzy]

My children and their partners earn more than me these days.

What could I possibly buy them that they don't already have,  or don't actually want.

An acknowledgement is all they get from me.

It's worked so far,,,

[Old_Geezer]

It's your own fault. If you hadn't had kids you wouldn't have this ethical dilemma. Why not check to see if it's too late to have them aborted ?

[1ozzy]

//A greeting on their Facebook page or a text message wishing them happy birthday//

Couldn't agree more

[1ozzy]

Well, it may be a tad late for abortion Old Geezer, but I guess adoption is still on the table,,

[barry1010]

We don't give any of our family Christmas gifts once they reach 18 but we do like to spoil them on their birthdays. Works for us.

The under 18s don't get expensive Christmas presents from us. They get too much as it is

[Ken4155]

For birthdays, i give my lot £20 and their partners a tenner. I began doing this when they were all 'courting couples' and saw no reason to change it.

At Christmas, i put a ton (weather permitting) in a card addressed to them both.

[davebro3]

I have no children & don't give birthday presents to anyone.

I gave money equally to a niece & nephew when they came "of age" but not specifically on their birthdays.

[douglas9401]

Like your style, OG. 😉

[FoxLee2]

To the partners you dislike: how about giving them an actual gift then you can spend as much (or little) as you like and add an accompanying note 'I saw this and thought of you'.