help needed

[w.h.y.?]

i think i do everything wrong when it comes to my other half,im not sure if its my fault or his,in previous relationships ive always been ok,secure in myself but im having quite a pickle in this one im even thinking by typing this im obsessing over him!!!i think what makes it worse is his my only friend &if i ever try and explain how im feeling it turns into an argument where he threatens to leave?!he says im too clingy.imtoo distant.i talk too much,i dont say whats on my mind...

[raysparx1]

It sounds like he is controlling your life,if you disagree,does he tell you,you don't know what you are talking about ? I think he has the problem, he isn't interested in your views or opinions, if you told him what was on your mind would he listen ? I doubt it very much, you seem to have lost a bit of self confidence,try getting out on your own, evening classes,or a hobby to build up your self esteem again, good luck, Ray

[w.h.y.?]

i think you could be right,i used to have quite alot of friends and i never ever thought about a partner as much as i do him,we've been together 5 years and im not allowed to phone him unless its to do with a family issue,i want to feel confortable again,and just not care,but i feel its really my fault for letting it get this far,blimey

[raysparx1]

If he is a stronger character than you,it could undermine your self esteem,don't let it happen,be strong, he probably enjoys being the dominant partner,but if you don't like the feeling of being dominated,try to be a bit more assertive,get in touch with your friends,enjoy a night out with them now and again, don't ask permission,just do it,you need your own time and space, good luck, Ray

[w.h.y.?]

thankyou.

[generationga]

just let him do what his doing live your life and let him live his.you make your own choices , have a blo*dy back bone

[ummmm]

been there done that....get rid

[Englandfan]

Get some more friends, don't make him all your life, it'll destroy you if you otherwise. Always remember what is attractive and whats not. Being clingy isn't.

[Paul22118]

w.h.y. - I feel the most disspassionate advice that can be offered here is 'you can do better than this.'

It cannot last, act now.

[originalspa]

Why don't you join a course or something to meet new people who have the same interests as you? You'll make friends in no time!

[w.h.y.?]

oh for some reason my other half was so nice today!!just out the blue seemed to actually ask what i was interested in and got me some flowers,his whole attatude has just re-adjusted!!we're going out on an actuall 'date'yeay