Speed dating.

[Joe_the_Lion]

I am going speed dating in London next month. I have just one minute each to impress up to 20 birds. The evening has been arranged by a friend of mine who shares similar demographics with me, and the birds supposed to be of similar ilk to us.

My looks alone will probably not swing it straight away.

1) What do I wear?
2) Do I wear aftershave?
3) Do you kiss the girls' hand, cheek or not at all?
4) Do I mention spanking?
5) Do I play up or play down my accent?
6) Do I mention me being widowed?
7) Do I mention I dislike other peoples children?

Fair enough I have been to male finishing school, but such an evening did not feature in my training.

Also, is speed dating full of late twenty something old dogs desperate for kids before their womb heals up?

[B00]

Try not calling them "birds" for a start.

[Joe_the_Lion]

Sorry, for "birds" read tarts.

[-Z-]

A mate of mine went to a speed dating event in a club in Toon...he said most of the birds were not very impressive, but some gagging for "it"...it probably doesnt matter what you say to some of them. Having said that a bird at work's friends have been and they are all early/mid 20s and gorgioous.

[snagged]

You need to work on your attitude to the fairer sex a little more Joe!

[raysparx1]

Hello Joe, good luck, not that you will need it.
1 smart casual
2 a little eau sauvage NOT Brut !!!!
3 Kis the hand
4 NO
5 Speak as you do, unless she works down the market selling Fruit & veg
6 See how it goes, if asks if you have been married,yes
7 Definitely No

Couldn't tell you what they will be like,but I know a ladt that went and she is going to live with the man she met 6 months ago so it can work. might be a few bow wows there, take a lead and some bonios with you.

[Joe_the_Lion]

If you are implying I am sexist, I am afraid you are wrong. No woman of mine will ever have to work. Is that really so bad? Maybe for some old dungaree-wearing Dick Van what's-his-name, but for most boobed ones, they will be most grateful.

[Joe_the_Lion]

Thank you Uncle Raymondo for your deep insight. If she turns out like Mrs Ray I am sure I will knock her bandy.

[beryllium]

1) Smart/Casual
2) Do you usually?
3) No.
4) If it's a spankinkingly hot venue?
5) As you are.
6) If you need to talk about it.
7) If you're asked.

Never been myself, but I did do the advertising bit in the lonely hearts for a week lol.... but!!! it was the Financial Times hehe :-) and I did have a date or 2 ;-)

[Joe_the_Lion]

Perhaps you advertised this one bery. It is in The City (near the appropriately names famous meat market, so should be lots of high flying city birds there.

[-Z-]

Lots of stressed out City Crumpet gagging let to off a bit of stress in the best possible way

[Barmaid]

As someone who is currently having no luck on dating sites but has been on more dates than I care to imagine I would say that smart casual is best; wear aftershave but do not bathe in it (and use a more subtle variety), no kissing unless a hand or cheek is offered; I personally wouldn't mention spanking unless the venue is a Dungeon or she is wearing a gimp mask; as for your accent, if it is a cut glass upper class accent, do not hide it (if she can't handle that, well, frankly would you want to see her again?), if it is a Norfolk drawl, hide it; as for being widowed, unless the girl she is confident, you may find that the mention of that would be a conversation stopper, although personally, if asked I would say (unless it is something you would rather not discuss in such shallow surroundings which I think anyone would understand); again, if the subject turns to children, say so. There are some women out there who can't abide other people's children too (me included).

Your friend really should have booked you on a speed dating session with people of a similar age group, (I do not know what that age group is, but hopefully your friend would), but as to the rest I cannot comment.

But what do I know? I have a 100% unsuccess rate!!!! Enjoy.

[beryllium]

Sorry for delay in answering, had to run awf and start food lol... anyway Smithfields? Have a fantastic one and with your sense of humour I think you'll be a big hit!!! :-) xxx

[Athley]

Why don't you have a run through on here first and maybe some people can comment on your techniques. :o) Obviously you will need to describe your chosen clothes, aftershave etc.

xx

[-Z-]

Heres some chat up lines you could use.....

"Hello, you look like a nice filly....do you fancy a ride.....Dont worry pet, it'll only take a minute"

"Have you got a goodlooking best mate we can have a threesome with"

[sleepyj]

i was told you have to take a bank statment lol

[Eve]

Well having been a stressed out city girl...not so sure on the crumpet bit lol:

1) Dress to impress, if it's city high fliers then a sharp tendy suit dressed down so more casual than "I've just left work".

2) A dash is nice, get some advice from a lady and don't overdo it, a nice hint rather than overpowering.

3) City wise I'd say the cheek, a nice affectionate (not slobbery) peck, probably on both cheeks in the City while holding the hand (s) gently.

4) Not unless you want a slap :)

5) What kind of accent do you have?

6) Difficult one, only if it comes up but unlikely in such a quick meeting.

7) Probably not at first lol.

[Hellion]

Personally Mr WM I think you should be yourself ,after all you can't spend the rest of your life pretending to be someone else - your wife presumably liked you as you are!

1. What you feel most comfortable in
2. Personally I think even nice aftershave can be off putting, soap and shampoo are much nicer.
3 Cheek
4. Only mention spanking if she's wearing a T shirt saying 'I like being spanked'
5. Own accent
6. No - saying you're a widower could make you vulnerable to predators!
7. Yes - but would you like your own children!?

Have fun - but somehow I can't see you finding a future Josephine the lioness there somehow!

[sense4all]

1. Smart , but dressed down. No knobby jackets with jeans tho' ! For heavens sake polish your shoes, first thing I look at personally.
2.A very light touch of something classy.
3. If a cheek is proffered kiss it.
4.If a cheek is proffered do not recommend you spank it hun!! Save that as a wee surprise at a later date.
5. If you can ennunciate, do so.
6. Yes , if asked.
7. Yes - if relevant.

If there is the over whelming sound of ticking check it's not a Jaeger le Coultre first, scan their handbag to see if the have 101 one pot rabbit recipies peering out the top. Good luck