a date!

[Jennifer_667]

a few months ago i had my heart broken by my husband. he tried and tried but i just felt like not no more. i met this guy couple of months ago but since i was still hurting i just never paid any attention to him. i recently had a date with him and i had so much fun and since it was a clean date as in just friends i don't feel bad or guilty. but i wanna know if i should continue on this friendship? am just so scared it might be more than that later.

[angussyung]

Hi.
I reckon it may turn into 'something else' with this other guy.
You should decide if you can make it up with your husband. You dont say what he did, and I m not asking.
In my experience, (Im male, hetero), friendships between males and females invariably end up with sex.
Hope this helps.

[pitapan]

yeah its gonna turn out to be more, beacuse your playing the dating game with a broken heart.....
bad idea.
heal first, that would be like stepping back into the ring with a broken foot.
wait.

[lounurse]

Its good to get out and have some fun I think, but let this guy know from the offsett exactly where you are at and what you are wanting/not wanting from this relationship. If things change in the future with him then you can update him on your feelings, just don't lead the guy on. If you just want a friendship then why the hell shouldn't you. You may find its just what he is looking for to!

[Reverandfunk]

Just go out and have some fun, if anything happens fine if not you've lost nothing.

[cartman99]

Jen,

continue with it, cross bridges as and when (and if) you get to them.

I have friends who are girls, we go dancing, have meals, get drunk, stay up allnight and look out for one another, it doesnt have to end up in bed.

[Jennifer_667]

Well the thing is that me and my husband seperated about 8 months ago and he dated a younger girl! After he saw that (Yeah I washurting but didn't show him.) I acted like I didn"t care he tried to make it up with me and well at first yeah of course thats my husband, but then he starts playing the little game were "oh I rather be with her sorry I Cna't be with you" Bull stuff so I let it go knowing it hurt me. This was about 2 months ago and now that I meet this guy I fell good cause I had fun and believe me it would not turn out in bed...... Besides he knows were am coming from cause he was married for 11 year and his been separated for 1 or 2 years. I believe we're not lieing to each. And thats a good start right?

[angussyung]

Jen,
I feel that you're hurting and looking for comfort
You need to seriously look at what you want. If you carry on seeing the other chap, it MAY end up as something else.
Especially as deep down you may want to get back at your husband for hurting you.
Perhaps try RELATE?
You have been hurt, if you can heal, you could survive your marriage. If not, it could be doomed.
Trust me, Ive been there.

[Jennifer_667]

I understand what your saying but the thing is that I was hurting and am not all in pain any more I've got over it and now that I wanna get to know this guy my husband now wants to act like he wants me and like if cares. Why now? Why just because I wanna move on? I feel like his only doing this cause I wanna let it go. I mean first he straight out told me he wanted to be with her regarless of our child and now... Now he cares, Thats the thing that this always happens and I don't know what to do now, am honestly confused, I liked the date vary much and My husband don't make me feel like that and I understand that after couple of years married it ain't going to be like at the beginning. so please explain to me how things work.........

[cartman99]

RELATE is an excellent suggestion, the chance to talk with a mediator is very valuable. It will give you a different perspective and help you and him, buts it you we care about!.

x

[Jennifer_667]

Well thank you so much.. But am I really doing the right thing? My heart wants me to move but am afraid it might be me who doesnt.