Is the internet a relationship maker or breaker?

[legend758duo]

hers a question that has crossed my mind more than a few times .
ive only been online for 16 months but i know folk who have been on a lot longer on sites like ab and the old cb, that there have been many marraige break-ups and relationships too due to online cyber relationships starting on just these two sites alone!!!wehn you take into accoutnhow many other sites there are and also msn .
it makes you wonder if this isnt causing or just contributing to a break down in relationships?
any views folks??

[tiny e.a]

I'd say more of a contribution than a cause, there must be something already wrong with the relationship to make people start spending so much time on the sites and to be tempted to stray in the first place.

[mrknowall]

Well said tiny

[Goodsoulette]

I agree with tiny, no way a cause. You would have to be unhappy in the first place to start a "proper" online relationship with someone. Although as long as there is no meeting does that count as cheating? Im not sure. I cant say I would like my boyfriend getting verbally intimate with someone but I dont know if it would break us.

[legend758duo]

well is uppose if youre a housewife and in all day.maybe watching some screaming kids then its easy to use it for fun.
then after time i suppose you might you might get involved.
doesnt mean there was anything wrrong .not all the time.

[legend758duo]

goody good point.but dont you think there are some predators out there?
in fact there must be there are for young kids so im sure the same works for some married men looking for some fun but not willing to give up the good thing they have.
or married women too.
after all there are folk who swing and swap so i suppose they must be online too?
goody if your partner took verbal convos to the phone would it worry you then or are you more trusting than that?

[Goodsoulette]

Legend Im not really sure. I mean if it was a sex chat line, probably not. If I was certain they never had any intention of meeting them and was just using it as a bit of a turn on, I could probably forgive. I have had a couple of long term relationships and if I thought for one minute my other half had never thought about having sex with someone else, I would be a fool. Its not a lot different to thinking about it, if you dont actually do anything.

And yes, I agree that there are married men out there looking for affairs as there are married women, i think the internet makes this a lot easier but in my mind that isn't the basis of a solid relationship. Best to be found out and dumped, they would do it anyway. I think the internet gives opportunity to people who might normally struggle to find a date, sexual partner etc because although the immediate attraction might not be there you can connect on a different level.

[Goodsoulette]

I dont think you have to be looking for it to connect online. Look at how many of the girls here coo over Wardy and Ray!

On here though there are obviously girls that come on just to get attention from men, I personally find it a little embarrassing and pitiful. In that it makes me think they cant get ANY attention off line. That sounds very callous reading it back but its just my opinion.

[Supernick]

I'm betting that section of the internet that causes the most problems in a relationship is pornography rather than the various chatting options that are available.

As for being unfaithful with people, I think that Facebook, MySpace and Friends Re-United are probaly the biggest relationship breakers. I think the threat of someone running off with an old flame or friend is more likely than the random meeting of minds on AB. Me and GoodSoulette are just the exception to the rule ;-)

[Goodsoulette]

*sobs* Nick, I thought you loved me.

[legend758duo]

"On here though there are obviously girls that come on just to get attention from men, I personally find it a little embarrassing and pitiful. In that it makes me think they cant get ANY attention off line. That sounds very callous reading it back but its just my opinion. "

for once i have to say hands in the air carsd on the table that i wholeheartedly agree with you on that.
a bit of a shock i know.

but i do get a bit sick of the coo coo ing and attention seeking too.

offline life must be so dull for some folk???

[legend758duo]

pa ul what lad di you fancy at school then???


maybe we can help you on here to find him??

[Supernick]

I do. As soon as I can teach the string quartet to play Starsailor, we'll be married.

I like the points made about flirting online though. I really don't know where you draw the line, and what is unnacceptable.

[Pippa68]

Friends Reunited has been cited as a cause of relationship break ups.

Personally I reckon it was just a tool..not a cause. Rather like the gun a killer would use to shoot someone.

[knobbynonuts]

I am getting married to someone I met of the net nearly four years ago after her marriage broke up a year before we met as her her ex husband went of with someone who he met on the net.
Just a little bit of interesting information for you there legend....

[knobbynonuts]

yea know what you mean legend but you could look at is this way..
Have just got 2 tickets to see muse at wembley got them of e bay bought them both for �43 inc postage and recieveid them today and the person that sold them could not go and the 2 tickets cost him more than doublle than what I paid.
Anway legend I havent got a clue about what I am trying to say so please forgive me as me and the misses to be are meeting up at liverpool sreet station in london on sat afternoon after I go to work and having a great night as muse will be playing (invinsable) and that is what we are even though she dont like that song