What makes men settle down??

[fizzyBee]

What is it that makes men seem to quite suddenly change from wanting no real commitment, going from girlfriend to girlfriend, going out drinking and being a lad to wanting to get married, get a mortgage, have kids and work like crazy to be the provider?

[B00]

hate to state the obvious, but wouldnt that be when they find someone they love?

[4getmenot]

or when they finally grow up

[4getmenot]

and all there mates have and they realise they will be left on their own if they dont

[andrea81]

It happens for men the same as women I suppose, they arn't aliens! I agree Boo - when they find the right girl, they settle down in a normal way.

I find it hard to believe men just wake up one morning and think it's a good day to get married. It probably starts with something casual then love then marriage. Same as girlies!

[Pippa68]

Rather like women really!

[4getmenot]

Dont totally agree with that andrea some men find the one they love but are too stupid to see it until its too late

[B00]

terrible generalisation there 4get!!

[Pippa68]

Being in love doesn't necessarily mean wanting to settle down, have a mortgage, marriage & kids.

I believe that waking up one morning and wanting to get married is possible, andrea ~ it happened to me and mr Pippa..only on different occasions!

[fizzyBee]

I had an argument last night about my fiance working all hours and things being so settled when we havn't been together that long because from what I understand of his past he was kind of wild right up will when we met. He's done lots and I wanted us to do lots together. We met and he proposed to me after maybe 2 months. All he wants now is marriage (although he did agree to a lond engagement), kids and getting us a house and our own business so we can be comfortable. Then I realised maybe I was being really silly because this is probably everything I could want too and we will be doing more important things together. xx

[andrea81]

Pippa - I was only trying to make her see that man arn't too different to us! I don't hink you should generalise men. But there again, we all have our own experiences don't we. yours was one and mine is another. Me and my hubby fell in love gradually and when he asked me to marry him, I was ready!

So I guess i'm not completly out of it to say that it CAN happen for men just like women! Just like women CAN miss an oportunity because they were too stupid.

My point is not to generalise!

[4getmenot]

not generalising BOO just saying it isnt always when you meet the right person.

[Pippa68]

I agree with you andrea ~ it can be the same for both men & women (see my first answer)

:o)

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, from a guys point of view.
If you meet the right woman, you feel as though you want to stay with them.
You end up being uncommitted once she gets boring and doesnt 'keep you keen'.
Thats the problem where most women go wrong these days. They can get a guy, but they cant keep one satisfied...

[Kleiber]

Age! (She says, tounge in cheek!!)

[natterley]

Well Im going to have to resort to hypnotizing some poor swine if i've got any hope of ever getting married!!!!....So maybe he will just wake up and feel like marrying me!!!!!
xx

[EngTeach]

I do believe it is when they fall in love. I think men are more likely to keep "light" relationship going until they find THE ONE. Usually women don't see that he is not as commited as she is until it's too late. This is why we women call them commitment-phobes. There was very popular book out 2/3 years ago titled "He's just not that into you" . It got a lot of flack, but was very enlightening. We help men keep these fake relationships going by tolerating booty calls, lame excuses about why he did not call/come over and call them relationships when his every action or inaction should scream to us that "HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU"

As the author very clearly states, whe he is into you he will call, see you, and do the right things. This is when they settle down. IMHO

[WendyS]

It's either when they fall totally in love and realise they just don't want to spend the rest of their lives without that special person.

OR

All their mates in the pub or the football team have beaten them to it in the marriage stakes and are happy to stay at home and do domestic things and he's sitting all lonely at the bar on his own drinking a solitary pint !