Sex !

[Jillius]

Now that I've got your attention..............................
Has anyone got any really funny experiences about sex ??
My cousin, who is quite plump, was having a session with her new fella but she was mortified that her flab kept smacking loudly against him.
Afterwards he said to her " I know I was good but you didn't need to clap !!"

[Lueclue]

OMG I would be mortified if that happened to me! At least it didnt put him off though.
I do remember having a particular passionate evening with my fiance and being so distracted that I fell off the bed and landed on a heap on the floor! however this did not deter us as we continued where I was!

[Skreecheeboy]

One of my ex's staff who was also her lodger walked in on us at it on the couch once. Poor lad hadn't long come out of the closet and was a wee bit petrified by the whole incident!

[Skreecheeboy]

We hadn't locked him in a cupboard or anything, I meant he'd come out as being gay and was completely mortified by us!

[sophie_1003]

hahaha! didnt even think of u locking him in the cupboard til u said but is now amusing me no end!

[123everton]

I had sex with one of my exes on the top deck of a bus (Leyland Titan) only to see a bloke watching from his bedroom window, it did'nt stop me as he could'nt see much (don't think so anyway) I did'nt think to mention it to her at the time. Or since!

[rabbitygirl]

My son, when aged about 4, woke and tried to come into our bedroom at the wrong time. As we were having sex across the bed and the door was close by, somehow my husband carried on and kept the door closed by pressing one foot against it.

My husband was going for a big finish, but I was laughing at his acrobatics and our young son loudly knocking and calling to come in.

[tiggerblue10]

On a beach at night in Turkey. We had a big shawl over us and someone walked towards us, realised what was going on under the shawl and said "ooohh sorry" and walked away very hastily. I couldn't carry on after that. Lol

[Ice.Maiden]

Hi TB - well speaking of Turkey, I managed to do the evil deed at a certain open-air disco!!! There were so many people milling around, no one noticed - or at least they never said anything! In the light of day, I was mortified!

[tiggerblue10]

Very easy to get carried away once you get going IM. Hello xxx

[Ice.Maiden]

I'm sure I WOULD'VE been carried away if anyone'd spotted me! And hi - x

[tiggerblue10]

I've got an image of Woodstock/flowerpower and free love in the mud going round my head now! Lol

[Ice.Maiden]

I would've loved Woodstock. Those were the days!

[~max~]

Unfortunately (or hilariously!), I've got plenty of those...lol
My first "time": Japanese flatmate walked in on us, doing it on the sofa. She just went "OH!" and walked out again! We never learnt where she actually spent the night, given it was 11pm....
But the best I think, apart from the "people walking in while you're at it" thing, is when my ex and me tried to have sex in a back alley..Me sitting on a wheelie bin, him in front (Quite a tall guy...lol)..Well, the bin tipped forward, and I landed on him knees first....Result: dislocated shoulder (for him), VERY bruised balls (for him!) and horrendusly grazed knees (for me!). :O)

[gucciman]

i was shagging my ex who was a bit on the large side, i was quite happily pumping away and enjoying myself when she said to me "you do know your not in the hole don't you" turns out i was shagging a roll of fat. that night we were going out with friends and when we were in the taxi she told everyone including the taxi driver what had happened, i could have died!

[Jillius]

gucciman, what a laugh ! I'm going to be giggling all day now thinking of that.

[lilminxlou]

making love in my boyfriends mum's house.. apparantly, to the delight of his 2 older brothers his bed squaks LOUDLY and the floorboards creak. had many stories of wat went on downstairs while we were upstairs!!

[anderlee]

This is quite gross but I will tell you anyway.....

Got very drunk on wine years ago, took this guy (who I did know) back to my mums. Rolling around the floor for a bit, I think I blacked out then I woke up. Still dont know if we did it (terrible I know) and then he said ' I think thats yours'. I looked at the floor in a haze and it was my used tampon which he had pulled out. I was too drunk to care!!!!