Lap Dancing

[Uttingbuzz]

I am recently married having been with my partner for over 5 years. In the last couple of months we have had hardly any physical contact as he says he is tired and stressed from work. At the weekend he went on a stag do and they were all going to a lap dancing club to end the night, before he left for the weekend he knew i wasnt bothered he was going there as part of the stag party but i did stipulate no paying for private dances to which he said he wouldnt as not that interested. He came back and told me all as part of his weekend story that he had a lap dance blah blah blah. I froze at this point and asked him to rewind, i felt sick that he hasnt been near me physically yet paid some bint to take all her clothes off and lap dance on him. I am not sure i can get over this. Am i being OTT or is my marriage doomed before even our 6month anniversary!

[gucciman]

perhaps he has genuinely lost his sex drive because he is tired and stressed from work.
as for the lap dancing, he was out with his mates on a stag night and probably felt under pressure to join in and have a dance.
i used to go to lap dancing clubs all the time, there harmless fun and your not allowed to touch.
forget the lapdancing completely, its irrelevant, have a good amicable chat with him and see whats up.
you say you have a high sex drive and are adventurous, if i had a wife like you i wouldn't need to even think about straying so find out whats the underlying cause, dont throw your marriage away for nothing.

[joggerjayne]

He's a bloke. He does bloke things.

He drinks, goes out with his mates and, in front of his mates, shows a bit of bravado in some silly club.

You should be relieved that he's a normal guy.

The question of your own relationship with him is another matter, but honestly, regarding the lap dance? Watch my lips ...

... D O ... N O T ... W O R R Y ... !!



(maybe "watch my lips" wasn't the best expression in the circumstances(!), but you get my drift)

[zingara]

Hi Uttingbuzz, i'm sorry you had this experience. The responses that have been written just go to show how different we are as humans. I think I would have reacted the same as you, I could accept him being in the club as part of the party but I would expect a little more self control with regard to him paying for a dance and more consideration for my feelings. I hope you are both able to resolve this without going to the divorce courts, have you asked him how he would feel if you had done the same?