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bit embarrased!!

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bantingm | 14:43 Fri 24th Oct 2008 | Relationships & Dating
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my boyfriend likes to hear of stories (mostly when drunk) about me and other women, so i tell him in great detail to keep him happy. however i do find myself feeling quite turned on by the thought of it....im definatly not gay but why do i want a womenly experience?!?! i had one at a very young age with my best friend, which was all a bit fumbly and stupid, and when i think of that now i cant help but laugh... does this make me different?! whould i be worried!?!
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coughs

Erm, I'm just thinking where to start.

Give me a couple of minutes.
Surely you'd be just as turned on if you were describing any sexual fantasy?

I don't understand why you feel worried either??
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becasue im a girl too....why do i get turned on by other girls?! im tried to broach this subject with friends using the old "i know someone...." trick and they all thought that "someone" was odd...ideally i would want a threesome so my man was involved too....but im worried that i might regret it afterwards! soo much confusion!
Okay, here goes.

I split up from my (fairly long term) boyfriend a few months ago. The night it happened, I got absolutely trolleyed, and had a �womanly experience� (great description, by the way) with a couple of my friends.

The next morning, I was ready to be embarrassed, but we just looked at each other mischievously and laughed.
It�s happened a few more times since. I must say, one of the friends is one of those girls who looks as if she was drawn by a man. Everybody who ever meets her, man or woman, finds her attractive.

Anyway, here�s the thing ...

You don�t have to be worried.

It doesn�t make you �different� ... I think most women would try it if they were in the right situation.

It�s a great experience.

But ... as you�re in a relationship, make sure that your b/f is genuinely comfortable with it. Men are notoriously �all mouth� but, when it comes to the crunch, they are a lot more inhibited than we are. Ask a man when he last gave himself a DIY and he will change the subject. Ask a girl, and she will list the last ten good ones.

So be really sure that he�s not just creating a private fantasy for himself.

And you may be better to keep it "all girl". If your b/f is involved, he is likely to concentrate on the other girl, and you might feel a bit awkward.

And if you go for it ... have fun !!!

Oh, one last thing ... how to "broach the subject" ? Go out with your girlfriends, get really p*ssed, flirt wildly, and see how they react.
most men are quite keen on the idea, on the principle of one girl good two girls better (when they envisage threesomes the third party is seldom male). As long as he isn't afraid of losing you to another man he probably won't be too alarmed - but as Jayne says, it's worth checking first. After that, whatever turns you on. What you and your friend/s do is your business and nobody else's.

As for being different - well, yes, actually, I suspect you are; despite what Jayne says, most people do keep their experiences heterosexual. But that's no reason why you should if you don't want to. Nothing wrong with being different. Enjoy yourself.
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Thanks for you answer joggerjayne, helped loads!!

luckily i too was born to good looking parents and carry the genes (!!) god that sounded stuck up, im not normally so arrogant i promise!! women have come onto me in the past but mostly butch blokie ones.., i would like my experience with someone femanine and lovely but maybe with some large mole or something jsut to take the focus off her and back onto me so i dont get so jelous of the old boyf taking more interest!!

xx
Okay, I accept what jno says, in that is is "different" to the extent that it's different from the norm, or the majority.

The main characteristic for a girl partner to have, is to be one of those women who doesn't brood over things. The sort where you have a row, and the next time you see her it's totally forgotten.

That way, if it goes well, fab. If it doesn't really work out, you both go ... ah, well, never mind, and forget it.

The more I think about this, the more I think you should leave your b/f out of it, and just talk him through it afterwards. There are too many unpredictable dynamics. Keep it simple ... just shag one of your girl friends while he's out with his mates. Overnight is best. Then you don't have the awkward "getting up and going home" situation.
hmmm, sorry Jayne, but I think shagging anyone when you're in a relationship with someone else is asking for trouble. Numerous aggrieved posts in this section, with indignant replies, seem to agree with me. If bantingm wants to experiment she should either let him know or be prepared for the relationship to end. My guess is he won't mind at all but I could be way wrong.
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but is that cheating?!
to me, yes, it's cheating. Doing something he knows about isn't cheating (because he has the option of doing something about it). Doing it behind his back fits the dictionary definition of cheating to a T.
<<<is still reeling from jno saying "shagging"....

Golly!!
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i think its cheating too....

i would never do anything behind my mans back be it with a male or female. i would like him to join in...but worried ou relationship would never be the same again...the truth is, i will either do it when were both very drunk or never the whole time im with him if he wont join in!!!
Just come back to AB and this post.

jno ... yes, I agree.

bantingm should not do anything behind her b/f's back.

I thought it was taken for granted that he would KNOW about it, because part of the object was to be able to tell him all about it.

The issue was whether or not he should join in, and I think the answer is that he should not.

I think we agree with each other, but may have got the wrong end of the stick.

x
just quoting Jayne, B00... Her advice is sensible; I just read her wrong. Sorry, JJ
Face it, you and Jayne are a pair of dykes at heart.
judging by the length's of your replies jayne
i'm betting you might do the odd column for a sunday newspaper lol

xxx
Why don't you get Jayne's phone number?
i've already got it clott lmao
You are another dyke zigzag, this place seems to be full of queers?
they dont call you clott for no reason!!! do they lmao

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