Why do I get myself into these situations? Is it my fault?

[katangel26]

Hi all, I used to be a regular on here but haven't been on for about two years!!! I thought my love life was sorted (with the mechanic) but that was going downhill very slowly and it ended pleasantly considering!! Since though all I've met are blokes in relationships, whether they've been with them for 5 or 15 years, that are majorly prepared to cheat on their other halfs :(. I must admit, at weak times I've agreed (considering at the time I had no qualms with it as I as 'the single one' in my eyes), but I've been strong for the last few months and have ended all ties with them but I am still seeing someone who's got 'other commitments' which I intend to end very soon. My question is, why have I, in the last god knows how long, attracted blokes that are in relationships?? Why can I never get the unattached or single ones?? It worries me all the blokes that I like, are attached, whereas all the single ones don't interest me (even though I meet alot of them and have several single blokes that are good mates, although they try it on and I fend them off)!!! Any advice?

[trt]

Maybe you are going to the wrong places Kat.?

[katangel26]

Where else can I go? I can't do night classes etc x

[Sgt.Rock]

You seem to enjoy the "thrill" of being with men who are already spoken for. Think you need to get your head sorted out.

[CheekyChops]

I know exactly what you mean, I find the same.

When I go out to my local, all the regulars tend to be married or in a relationship and none of them give two hoots about their other half. Its like they walk through the door of the pub and forget about their partner completely until they walk out again hours later.

And what type of woman would let her husband/boyfriend spend Fri/Sat nights in the pub until god knows what time - I certainly wouldn't, I know what they get up to!

[Velvetee]

Where are you meeting these men Kat, would it be on dating websites?

Maybe you are attracting these types because you are giving them the time. Do they tell you from the start they are in relationships or do you only find out once you've been sucked in?

It sounds like you are yet another woman to be only attracted to "bad boys". The fact they are in relationships, but happy to approach you, would give them that bad boy status. Only you can break this cycle and recondition your brain to stop this addiction. Perhaps counselling would help.

[happyone2]

I wonder if you have a committment issue.

Perhaps really in your heart of hearts you dont want to be in a committed relationship because perhaps in the past you have been hurt in one or your experience suggests they get stale and arent exciting ???

Married men, mean you get what you want but you know they dont want more of you.........................

I can certainly identify with this one !!

[4getmenot]

yer I;d say its you that doesnt want to be tied down so you fall for the ones that are

[jno]

yes, rather than worry about why these men like you (you can't really do anything about that), it's worth asking yourself why you like them. Happyone may be on to something there.

As to why the single ones don't go for you - that I really don't know; but do they see you making out with the married ones? If I was a single man I don't think I'd be attracted to someone who didn't seem to take marriage seriously (though that's just a guess).

[jock.strap]

any advice?

yeah, try not going after married men

[beso]

You are letting the men do the choosing. There are far better guys out there who are just waiting for a woman to take an interest.

Look around for the younger man who looks like a fish out of water when it comes to women. They can be trained into excellent lovers and will stick with you instead of chasing tail whereever they see it.

Hooking up with unfaithful married men is a road to nowhere.