Post-date advice required!

[jo3anna]

Hello,
Had a date last night with a guy who although was nice, I had no chemistry with and no interest in seeing again.
He text me today to ask me out again - whats the best way to say no without being too honest???

[badcompany]

just tell him that you used to be a dude and he'll run a mile!

[cazzz1975]

just say that the date made you realise that you are not ready to date anyone at the moment, you have stuff you need to do, thanks anyway

[jo3anna]

Knowing my luck he'd be more interested!

[Ice.Maiden]

Why not BE honest, jo? Tell him that you don't think it's fair to lead him on - but that, nice as he was, there was just no chemistry there from your point of view. Wish him a happy New Year, and tell him that you hope he finds the girl he's looking for. x

[jo3anna]

Good advice Ice Maiden, thanks.

[Velvetee]

I agree with Ice. Be honest, don't keep him hanging on in hope.

When I met my partner though, I felt the same, I wasn't in the slightest bit interested, as he wasn't my usual type. Anyway, I gave him a chance and my decision was right, as he is the best partner and future husband a woman could ever want and he will also be a great father to our unborn baby.

[ummmm]

Same as velvetee. I'm completely in love with a man I never thought I'd ever go out with.

Give him a couple of chances :-) you never know...!!!

[Ice.Maiden]

Yes, Velvetee's got a point. It's not always great instant attraction, but then after getting to know someone better, the good qualities shine through.
Think it depends on what you're looking for, jo - and whether you're prepared to give the guy another chance. If not - just be honest, but in as kind a way as possible, because it's not as if he's done anything wrong.

[Velvetee]

The type of men I would usually go for and had that chemistry with were always the wrong types. They were generally unreliable, selfish and sneaky. I could never trust or depend on them.

I eventually realised my poor choice in men, meant I had to no longer take the responsibility of choosing someone and decided to let the right man choose me instead. It really did work for me.

[Sgt.Rock]

Tell him he's good looking, intelligent, well dressed and doesn't smell - the exact opposite of what women find attractive these days.

[20SilkCut]

Velvetee i kinda like your thinking on this one...'letting the right man choose me'...glad it has worked out for you........BUT........ i just dont know if i could give up my choice and responsibility as far as choosing a man is concerned....i think maybe it would have to be a joint decision...

[jno]

I agree, 20SilkCut... Velvetee was lucky. I wonder if the guy who chose her knew she usually went around with Mr Wrongs. She should really have thought about what she was doing wrong and tried to sort herself out... but I suppose you don't need good judgment if you've got luck!

[Velvetee]

I don't have good luck, just decided the usual good looks and a muscular body didn't equate to a caring, decent life partner. I had to put my shallow ideals aside and give a decent, kind and caring man, the chance he deserved.

Too many people place too much emphasis on how people look and whether there is sexual chemistry. The sex will not necessarily last forever, so there needs to be more depth there, than just the physical.

Saying that, my Fiance is attractive, in a different way to what I used to like, he's over 6 feet tall and well built. I have the best man I could ever have dreamed of.

[alishalexy]

Been there lots of time, not dating but making excuses to save the other persons feelings. Your ex came round and begged for another chance....
Theres been a funeral can't think right now,sorry find someone else..... I know awful, not helping am I
The one I used was its not you its me excuse, I know , heard it later on a film on tv and thought thats my famous one.Can't use it know they showed it on tv.
I got clamidia, was it you and when he says he never slept with you blame someone else. Hopefully he will get put off!
No never used that one! No one would believe me on that one.
He shouldn't get upset if you just said I feel the chemistry is not there. Or I got back with my ex sorry. Be honest its best.