PND in someone with a borderline personality disorder.

[daffy654]

My eldest daughter has been mentally ill for several years and was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder a few years ago.She cuts herself when she is feeling particularly bad and has been voluntarily admitted to psychiatric services a couple of times.
Last July she gave birth to a beautiful little girl but since the birth has been through hell with depression.She won't take her medication regularly and is spiralling downhill again.
Recently she and her boyfriend split up and she and the baby moved in with my other daughter until she finds somewhere else to live. There have been a few discussions about her allowing me to take over looking after the baby for a while until she gets herself straight....I am very happy to do this but I am worried the baby's father may just come and try to take her away from me.
I know he has legal rights to do this as he is named on the BC so has parental responsibility.The problem is he is a drug addicted alcoholic and doesn't have the means or sense to look after my grandaughter,he just wants her so he can claim single parent benefits(he has admitted this to my daughter and a few of their friends).

How do I go about making sure he can't just waltz in and take the baby? Can I apply for parental responsibility myself? If I get parental responsibility can I then register the baby with my GP and health visitor as I would a child of my own?
I have never been in this type of situation before so would welcome sensible advice from anyone who has been through this themselves or is knowledgeable about the law.
Thanks.x

[Velvetee]

Sorry to hear of your situation Daffy. The best person to consult would be your local CAB office or a solicitior, specialising in Family Law. Most will give 30-60 minutes of their time free, for the initial consultation.

[stonekicker]

as well as trying to be responsible for the baby, you also need to be firm about your daughter getting help. depressive symptoms will increase the likelihood of self-harm and other risky behaviours associated with bpd. you must ensure she has a community support team looking out for her, the baby and yourself and be open and honest about how unwell she is. what you don't want to happen is some incident (of harm to your daughter or others around her) to occur and services wading in and taking decisions for you. tell it to your daughter like it is - if she starts taking control now, she is likely to retain some control. it won't stop her feeling crap right now, but will be much better in the long run. i am a mental health nurse and my partner has bpd - so i know what i am talking about! i will keep an eye on this thread and if you want to chat, i will try to help. take care, daffy x

[daffy654]

Hi folks,sorry it took me so long to read the replies but we had a situation that needed dealing with last night concerning my daughter so i've been away from the PC.

Velvetee.... I will visit a solicitor if I need to but I was hoping to avoid any excessive costs in it all, I will be no better off financially but will have an extra little person to support for a while. :-}

stonekicker....my daughter has a CPN but refuses to visit her or the GP,she is off her medication because her ex-boyfriend stole it all when his drugs ran out and he thought he could get high off it :(
Whenever I try talking to my daughter about her condition she gets very angry and thinks I am picking on her for nothing,she behaves like a sulky teen when she is actually 21 years old! I am going to have a straight talk with her and point out that SS could just take the baby and she may have no say in the matter if she doesn't sort herself out,that would be disatrous if it happened and I know exactly what the consequences would be....I would be attending my daughter's funeral ; ;
I will keep you updated on what happens.