ive fallen in love

[kitten_uk2]

im married, but im in love with someone else. no one knows but me, and now you. i get butterflies when i see the man in question, my heart beats faster and he brightens my day. i think about him most of the time, from waking up and going to sleep, he is even in my dreams. i dont even know if he knows i like him and wether it would bother him anyway. i know there is not alot i can do about this, as im married and i believe marriage is for life, some days i get so sad that i cant tell this man i love him. i cant act on it, but id just like him to know, that he should never feel unloved, because i think about him every day and hes special to me. its driving me loopy. im absolutely smitten, but im married, ;-(

[redman41]

Unhappy Marriages do not work long term so eventually you and your Husband will have to part company !
Is the person you love married himself ? Find out as much info as possible about him and then make your move.
Does he live or work near where you live ?
I'm Divorced myself after 14 years of Marriage and do not regret it as it was a case of Wrong time Wrong Person when I took the plunge. Go for it as your chance may never come around again !!

[Cockney_si]

I think you may well have answered your own question.

[4getmenot]

Yep if you believe marriage is for life then so be it

[kitten_uk2]

i love my husband, but i love this other man too, is that possible? the other man is a customer where i work, we chit chat, he comments about my hair and such like. he isnt married, his life is gambling. i know it would never work between me and this man. ive never known him to have a girlfriend. but my heart longs for him.and i just cant get him out my head.

[xRosiex]

It is possible for a person to experience feelings for someone else even when you are already in a relationship. This is not uncommon and can happen in most relationships. Maybe the reason that you are having these feelings is because you are bored and want a change in how your relationship is running. Try sitting down with your husband and talking about your feelings. If you do believe marriage is for life then maybe it is worth trying to change things in your relationship. For examle, try going on days out or cosying up together in the evenings. Hope this helps.

[andy-hughes]

I hate to burst your bubble, but you are not in love with this man.

You are in love with the idea of this man, and that is something very different indeed.

Because you are unhappy in your marriage, you are looking for an outlet for your unfulfilled needs, someone to give you back the feelings of excitement and fulfillment that you used to have, and you have lost along the way.

This man is obviously in blissful ignorance of your feelings, and you should kep it that way. Relationships in the workplace are frought with problems even when both parties feel the same way about each other - imagine if he was shocked and embarassed and simply didn;t reciprocate your feelings. He may feel he has to resign, report you for harassment, laugh out loud and tell al his friends - the scenarios are endless, and few of them pleasant.

What you need to do is recognise that this is a crush because you are lonely and bored, and this man gives you pleasure in a cerebral way, which is natural, and only harmful if it gets out of hand.

Why not try talking to your husband about ypur feelings - not about your collegue, but about your husband and you. If you get no-where, then try Relate who have vast experience, and could well set you both on the right track.

If, sadly, your marriage does come to an end, you will find love again, but don't put love where it does not exist just to make yourself feel better.

Hope this helps.

[4getmenot]

andy has it spot on as usual you wouldnt have fallen for this man if you loved your husband like you said. Talk to your husband and make things better at home first so you dont get the urge to stray

[sqad617]

She has never said that she is "unhappy" in her marriage.

[4getmenot]

No she isnt but this is what we are saying if she was happy she wouldnt have fallen inlove with another man

[aniani]

" Crush" was the first word to spring to my mind

[4getmenot]

yes but she is adamant she is in love

[sqad617]

Nonsense 4get, one can be happily married, two kids, house , car, career and then fall in love (whatever that means) with another man.

It happens everyday in every street in every town, in every country.

You have to weigh the pros an cons...the known of your own married lifestyle against the unknown of life with the "new man"

[ummmm]

Not love....just fantasy.

You could get with him and he could end up being a wife beater...or worse.

[mrs_overall]

I have exactly the same feelings for George Clooney and Sqad.
It's called a crush.

[sqad617]

Olive....you know I love you LOL LOL

P.S yesterday it was salla on heat and today it is you and salla LOL

[mrs_overall]

Are you 3 timing me with salla???????

[mrs_overall]

Cruch?

Typical bloody man - brains below the waist! lol