friend had sex with minor - what should i do?

[pollypower]

My friend has had sex with a minor, he was about 30 and she was 15. They had a secret relationship that lasted about 6 months. Although this happened about 2 years ago, it has just come to light. The circle of people that know - including the girl's parents - are trying to cover it up and keep it quiet.
I don't know what my obligation is here, the girl came to me and told me she doesn't want anything to happen to the guy, she said she loves him and wasn't pressured into sleeping with him. She is scared and upset people will find out and he will get in trouble.
The guy was fully aware of her age - he is also friends with her older brothers.
Trouble is, this is illegal, although the girl says she consented, plus he is also training to be a youth worker. If this 'gets out' I fear the implications for him could be far-reaching.
What do I do?

[sn�gs]

''I fear the implications for him could be far-reaching''

Maybe he should have thought about that before he dipped his wick...

[caththecrazy]

Let's hop it isn't true and all the children return to school unharmed

[MissNoway.]

report him!

[caththecrazy]

Your obligation is to think before you post.

[blackietwo]

I think your obligation lies with the other young people he may come into contact with, if he becomes a youth worker.

[Bbbananas]

He's a bit of a scumbag who took advantage - but at the end of the day, if her parents are fully aware and want to keep it quiet, if the girl herself is not traumatised by it and doesn't want to further the issue, I would keep out of it.

Of course he shouldn't have taken advantage, but 15 is hardly 13 or 12 or even younger - it was wrong, but if the family don't want it made public, I don't think it is up to you to bring it to the public forum.

[naomi24]

This is a wind-up.

[caththecrazy]

Agree Naomi

[Bbbananas]

Bl00dy hell - if it is, I fell for that one didn't I ?!!

What makes you think it's a wind up?

[pollypower]

i'm not sure why you think this is a wind up? there are some odd answers here...i'm a little confused.

[redcrx]

wonder if its the same friend whose mrs was caught watching porn?

if this was real surely it would be in law?

[pollypower]

I have posted my question in the law section as well - i'm new to answerbank though, wasn't sure which category to post it in. Being both a moral dilema and a legal issue.

[pollypower]

Dixiegal - he's not married, no children

it's very true, the parents found out and so did the brothers and it was ended, but kept quiet - until now when it has been leaked.
I have spoken to the girl and the guy - they both want it to be kept quiet.
I have no idea if he has done this before, but I'm very concerned that he is training to work with children.
Even if he is not reported to the police I'm of the opinion that he should stay well clear of any youth environment - it may have been a one off but he will be liable for accusation if ever a situation should arise in future.

[caththecrazy]

Post says my friend then goes on say the girl. If you are a friend how old are you?

Strange that someone would come new to a site and post this.

Shrieks wind up to me as the name isn't in tune with the words of the poster and I read a response by same poster.

[Sandy-Wroe]

If the girl won't make a statement to the police and the man denies everything then nothing happens.
He's clearly someone who should not be in charge of adolescents.

[jake-the-peg]

It may technically be illegal but there would never be a prosecution in such a case.

Where a 15 year old girl is a consenting partner the CPS do not see a prosecution as being in the public interest.

However it does get grey because although there is zero chance of him being prosecuted someone who'd employed him to work with children wouldbe very unlikely to take him on and quite likely to ditch him if they found out.

What do you do?

You ask yourself "who is the victim here" and you keep your nose out