he has to have his own way

[sacha.86]

my boyfriend of 3 years (who i have got a little boy to) is so stubborn. He expects every fri night out to himself. So ive said meet me in the midle and prove you can go this 1 weekend without drinking. So hes gone out and said he will be home at 11. It doesnt look like he is going to be home and he has been drinking what should i do to gain back some control? Males responce much appreciated

[albaqwerty]

and which night out do you have?

he goes out every friday.... you go out every saturday (you don't need to drink btw)

[sara3]

or get a babysitter and go out together..

[bunnygirl4u]

Yeah i agree with albaqwerty, if hes unwilling to go out as a couple then start making saturday your night out, get yourself all done up looking gorgeous to show him what hes missing out on.

Or just tell him NO and that is unfair of him to make you sit in by yourself at weekends, which should be family time, because i can imagine he will be too hung over and tired every Saturday to do any family activities.

[Postdog]

we all need our own space now and then, it's how we survive

[Androcles]

Why do you want to control him, if it seems he can't control himself? He's behaving like a little kid and you sound like his Mum. You may have to think about where this relationship is going if he won't change and you aren't prepared to live with it, and also want to "control" him. As some of the others say you can get your own back by going out and having your own evening every week, but is that really what you want? Looks like you need to have a discussion about what you both want out of the relationship remembering there is a child involved.....

[sacha.86]

there are quite a few more factors to it. He has other days out with his mates which i dont mind so he does get space. I want him to prove to me he doesnt need 2 rely on drink every weekend because he is not a nice drunk. I have alot of my own issues get very depressed and find it difficult to go out. He doesnt mind me cuming out with him but id rather not because he gets to drunk and becomes very difficult to cope with. Its not that i want him to stay in every weekend i just want him 2 prove he can do it for 1

[Androcles]

Seeing your latest response, I think you really need to think about where this is going. What will it be like if it is still the same in six months, a year, two years time?

[sara3]

going out together doesn't have to involve alcohol.. cinema? restaurant?

it doesn't have to be a pub or bar.

[sacha.86]

i dont want to control him just want things to go my way once in a while if i arrange a babysitter and a night out he always takes over

[albaqwerty]

did he/does he changre nappies etc.... how does he connect with his child?

[sacha.86]

i dont want to control him just want things to go my way once in a while if i arrange a babysitter and a night out he always takes over

[sacha.86]

i dont want to control him just want things to go my way once in a while if i arrange a babysitter and a night out he always takes over

[sacha.86]

he does help me with my son he is very good with him most of the time and he does talk to me every now and again he is a good person with his own problems and thats wot keeps me here. Its just the weekends really drink always come first and i would b happy for him to have every fri 2 himslf if there was some comprimise

[albaqwerty]

in what way does he "take over"?

[sacha.86]

he does help me with my son he is very good with him most of the time and he does talk to me every now and again he is a good person with his own problems and thats wot keeps me here. Its just the weekends really drink always come first and i would b happy for him to have every fri 2 himslf if there was some comprimise

[sacha.86]

erm... Ill say ryt ive got a babysitter lets go here and he`l just make sure we end up goin where he wants to go

[albaqwerty]

the little boy isnot just your son, he is also your partners son.

[sacha.86]

erm... Ill say ryt ive got a babysitter lets go here and he`l just make sure we end up goin where he wants to go