I need some advice please help

[Twoswit]

Me and my bf have been together for 5 and a half years now. He always wanted a baby, but i wanted to get married first. All he talked about was how he wanted a baby and he felt i was refusing to have his baby, I finally gave in and now we have a beautiful 7 months old son. He moved in when I was pregnant because he wanted to be with me every step of the pregnancy and help me out around the house. Now the problem is I really dnt like cohabitation because I feel he'll get too comfortable and not take seriously the idea of marriage. I wanted to take the baby to my mother's ( where he knows he's always welcome to come see the baby) and then move out. we'll move in together after marriage. He dosnt quite like the idea. I hate that he thinks we are too young to get married im 23 and he is 25

Do you think Im doing the rite thing?

[ummmm]

To young to get married but not too young to have a baby. Where is the logic in that?

Anyway...I think it's a stupid idea moving out. Your baby has both parents...that's how most people want it. Why would you take your baby away from his father because you want marriage? If it meant that much to you you should have put your foot down and refused to have a baby until you had a ring on your finger. You didn't...that's not your babies fault.

[redcrx]

i agree with ummmm.

why make your child grow up away from his father, thats not fair on anyone. And think about your mum too, will she really appreciate you turning up on her doorstep

[BagPussAA]

You seem determined to put this guy away. You are so lucky that you have a guy that loves you and wants to live with you and the baby. You can not force him to marry you but if you keep pushing him away then you could end up alone with the baby. Which would you rather do?

[SuDFB]

I see where you are comming from, to some people it marriage means alot. Look if he doesnt want to get married now you will have to accept that but at least put an engagement ring on your finger and talk about in a few years get married that way no one gets it completely their way.

Look I said to my husband too that marriage comes before children, luckily he agreed, but if he didnt I would of put my foot down.

One last thing he said you are refusing to give him a baby, well it is your body, and you should of just replyied that he was refusing to give you the marriage you wanted.

I think you need to make him understand that it is really important toy out.

[ummmm]

Too late for that...she's had the baby.

[fredpuli47]

' He'll get too comfortable' ? What's wrong with that ? Either you want to be a family or you don't. Either you're happy with him being around full-time ,like a proper husband and father, or you're not . Which is it? His putting a ring on your finger won't change that fundamental.

If you don't want that and prefer to live without him,then do that. Frankly, you are using the 'he's afraid to get married' reason as a cover. Even if he gave in and married,the ring won't change him. If he wants to stop living with you, he'll go when he wants, married or not. It's that he won't stick around that worries you, not the lack of a marriage certificate..

[Rubino]

Well, you are a little young for having a baby but now you can't turn back the time, so all you have to do is marry him and spend your life together cause the baby need both of you.

[ummmm]

A little young for having a baby? I had my first at 18...