I split from my ex-husband of 18 years a few years ago and was devastated. But I remembered my sister telling me many years ago when her husband had an affair (again) and she finally kicked him out that although it was the hardest time in her life (she had a two year old) she said it was also the most formative, and she would tell any woman going through it that they would be a better person for it. Well I was very happily married at the time and thought she was a nutter! But not now - although now I am seeing someone, I live on my own and see no reason to change things because I absolutely LOVE IT. I found out so much about myself - I've refurbished my new flat up to showroom standard and found that I can absolutely do anything I want to. I don't answer to anyone, come and go as I please (within reason for work, my cat etc - who incidentally menas more to me than any husband! sad but true...) I spend what I want on what I want. if I want a lie-in I have it, if I want toast at 3am I have it, if I want a bath with wine, candles and a bit of muzak - guess what - I have it!!!... the list is endless. Don't get me wrong, I love having my boyfriend over, but he knows the scenario, no secrets there, and it works for us. Life is good once more.