right....in a nutshell... have become very close friends with a guy from school 2 years below me through doing a school play together (im 17, hes 15) and recently he told me he has a crush on me/fancies me/whatever. How do i explain, nicely, that i cant go out with him or anything cos of the age gap? i dont seem to have done very well so far.... oh yeah, also, i would like to stay friends with him as hes a great lad! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, any advice or pointers would be gratefully received as i am at a loss as to what to do! thanks in advance everyone xx
He will take any form of rejection, no matter how nice you are about it, badly.
Don't offer friendship, he will be gutted.... it's like the final insult.
Just tell him you dont want a relationship with him, and don't spin out the story too much.
Then show your friendship, by being friendly towards him, but not leading him on... if you understand what I'm saying.
Good luck.
PS.
find teenage 'speak' so refreshing.... so he has a crush on your fancies or your whatever? Bless him.
Awww, lighten up on moo....
She's seventeen, that is so, so much older than 15 when it's the boy that's the youngest!
In less than a year she will be an adult, and during those formative years, peer pressure dictates. She wont be able to go for a drink with her 15/16 year old by. She will feel embarrassed.
Can't you remember how awful those years were?
When she's a bit older she will look back and kick herself, momentarily.
At my decrepit old age I think anyone two years younger than me is way too old for me!!! lol
well ok upto now you have not had the answer you want.
Why dont you just say we can be freinds but nothing else and tell him why spoil things as there fine as they are.
Its hard when you dont what to hurt the other person, im going through the same at 37 the other sex though
Moo, not only idiots have sex; friendship sometimes turns into intimate relationships. passion can lead to sex. Boys love to boost their egos by boasting whom they shag and how many.
The problem is his lack of years
If I had been rejected at by a girl I fancied at 15 (huge age gap or not) I would have been crushed, and as these are not called the formative years for nothing, it may have had an effect on future relationships. I know one chap who took rejection so bad that he swore never to ask another girl on a date EVER!! and to date he never has, (he's happily married with kids now).
Dont know how to advise you moo, I come from the "love em and leave em" school of thought
girls mature quicker than boys at that age so 2 years may not be much when you're, say, 25-27, but it is more than a nimber at that stage.
I remember when i was 17 i was looking at 19-20 year olds, definitely not 15.
just be honest, that you don't like him that way but like him as a friend.
as has been said, he will be sad either way so theres not a whole lot you can do but be nice.
So johnlambert,
You are from the 'love em and leave em school' but had never been rejected by a girl at 15!
It, as you say, would have affected your whole confidence level with girls.
Don't mean to be hard on you, but in order to help moo out here..... 'maybe, if you had been rejected during your formative years, you would be a little kinder to girls'??
You 'love em and leave em' scoundrel you ....lol