Re-writie the following paragraph with good presentation and accurately answer

[Janya]

Read the following document and revise it so it follows these guidelines. Be sensitive to audience needs, Projecting the company's image, control style with conversational tone, and appropriate voice, Choose strong words that will help create effective sentences and coherent paragraphs. evaluate content and revise readabity, then edit and rewrite for conciseness and clarity. Use effective design elements and suitable layout for a clean, professional appearance.
Ok I believe that is how the professor wants it done. Now for the questions. There are 2.

This is what needs revised:
1. I am a new publisher with some really great books to sell. I saw your announcement in Publishers Weekly about the bookseller's show you,re having this summer, and I think it's a great idea. Count me in, folks! I would like to get some space to show my books. I thought it would be a neat thing if I could do some live airbrushing on T-shirts to help promote my hot new title, T-shirt Art. Before I got into publishing, I was an airbrush artist, and I could demonstrate my techniQues. I've done hundreds of advertising illustrations and have been a sign painter all my life, so I'll also be promoting my other book, hot off the presses, How to Make Money in the sign Painting Business.
I will be starting my PR campaign about May 2000 with ads in PW and some art trade papers, so my books should be well known by the time the show comes in August, In case you would like to use my appearance as part of your publicity, I have enclosed a biography and photo of myself.
P.S. Please let me know what it costs for the booth space as soon as possible, so I can figure out whether I can afford to attend. Being a new publisher is mighy expensive!

Ok that is what needs revised.


2.What are the strengths and weaknesses of the original document from the original document?

[heathfield]

Beware, Janya! Educational establishments have ways of finding out if student work has been copied from the internet!
If we answer the question, do we get your degree? ;-)

[sunflower68]

blimey Janya, how very dare you!

[joko]

you have got a nerve!!

i cannot believe the cheek of some people on here!!

do you think we have nothing better to do??


try -

www.doyourownfookinghomeworkyoulazyswine.com

[sunflower68]

oi joko what you get the stars for?? :{

[joko]

ha ha sunflower, i don't think janya quite grasps what i said!

here, you can have mine - *** :o)

[Janya]

Sunflower you like my T*******les

[Janya]

and joko you look like my P****s

[Janya]

you dont wanna answer you can shut the **** up..alright, with your dirty Ass...and yeah Sunflower yellow **** and Joko pimp...you both can logon and become a member of www.******************************.com...hahaha

[sunflower68]

damn I can't work out what T*******les means, it's gonna bug me all day. Any ideas Joko and thankyou for the stars they made my week. xxxx

[joko]

...errr...pffffffff....ha ha HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

you are either about 13 years old, deleriously insane or just incredibly stupid.

what a pathetic response

enjoy your homework - you will obviously fail as you are clearly ill-educated and illiterate, so enjoy your lifelong job at macdonalds, try to earn those stars, eh? - hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaa

thanks for the stars - durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!


I don't know sunflower - probably some idiot teen-speak - and american at that - i'd like to know what P****s are, and what your yellow **** is!!!
I am a pimp with a dirty ARSE and proud!

[Janya]

you ******* joko and ******* sunflower, why the hell do you guys wanna dirty your mouth in first place...look at the first response..that man is decent to reply and knowledgeable...you dont have to show your attitutde if my intention was wrong...you can't just say THIS IS NOT RIGHT WAY OF EDUCATIONING ONESELF...but no you guys are ******* ********....you are not fit to educate and influence anybody..shame on you your ******* ********

[joko]

us dirty our mouths?

you are the one being censored in almost every sentence!!

you are the one who came here and quite rudely just expected someone to do your assignment for you!!
you didn't even ask! you just copied and pasted the text, gave orders and did absolutely nothing to it yourself.
this is ANSWERbank not DOYOURHOMEWORKFORYOUbank

and now you can't string a sentence together without swearing in the most puerile and petulant way, just because you didn't get your homework done for you!
did you honestly think someone was going to spend hours doing this for you, just to save 'yo lazy ass' the bother?

that shows a bad attitude to me

thanks for the stars though...

[Janya]

you wanna go on you little peice of ****....I m ready...you guys are suppose to correct when somebody is wrong...not show your attitude...you are making me more and more angry...I just wanna ease myself by giving you an abusive language, so that next time if somebody is wrong, you should explain, and let them know in polite words, why you can't answer them....is that too much too ask....you ******* ass....now shut the whole topic....or just be ready to get more responses from me.....be wise guy...and just shut up...you are here to answers questions, if you dont like to answer if something is wrong with the asker request them that he or she is not supposed to do this in nice words...you morons...hope you've learned your lesson

[joko]

OH...MY...GOD!!!

i must say i am absolutely terrified of you!
your language has me quivering all over! (this is called sarcasm, case you were wondering...)
yeah, you have sure showed me with your starred out language ***********************
could you be any more stupid??

learned my lesson? HAAAAAAAAAAAA

i think you need to learn a lesson!

are you seriously telling me that you need to be TOLD that this question is cheeky? are you that thick?

you knew damn well when you posted that you were being cheeky, but you thought you'd try it on and hope some poor sap would do this for you, didn't you?
you sad little braindead buffoon!

rather than coming on here asking people to do your homework for you i suggest you get back to the classroom and BEG your teachers to teach you basic english, spelling, grammar and how to string a coherent sentence together, you imbecilic hillbilly inbred freak!!

please try to speak proper english - your dreadful words are very annoying and as for your apparent threats of "more responses - *snigger* "...bring it on! "
i will run rings around you at every turn! you have not the mental capacity to construct a worthwhile argument and just sound like a real dimwitted cretin - we are not 'supposed' to do anything - we are here because we want to help people, by answering their queries, not by doing their schoolwork for them because they are lazy little ********!

i hope you are furious now - i can laugh all the more!

if you are having trouble with the words of more that 2 syllables, try a dictionary....haaaaaaaaaaaaa

[Janya]

Furious my ass...you are one lousy son of Bitch...one thing is for sure you have got nothing better to do...but answer my question...you love my question don't ya....you crazy mother ******...let's have fun abusing you...oh what did you say helping people .....and you...who the hell even buys your answer...even if they do..they sure do get an "F" ...go and get some work for yourself....orelse stop answering this particular question...I would have ignored you, lil peice of ****...but keep getting these responses from you moron...go and get some work...dont keep ruinin' people's lives by you lousy attitude...you buttheaded, ********** ass

[joko]

god, you get worse!

more incoherrent drivel...

yawn....