yes in my experience, a wage of nearly 40k between you will not entitle you to the means tested benefits. You will get child benefit though - your wages will be low enough for that. It's about £90 per 4 weeks. i suppose what you'd have to do is go back to work, perhaps evenings or nights if your kind of work would allow that, so that you don't need childcare. You have to, by law, have 2 weeks off after a birth, but you can go back directly after that. Child minders are cheaper than nurseries. Some parents get the grandparents to be unpaid childmingers if their circumstances allow, which is even cheaper of course. in my experience, you just manage
Be aware you are asking for comments from the "we didn't get CB or even maternity pay in the good old days, why should i pay for you to have a family" brigade!!