A New Life!!

[prettyneat]

Abt a year ago i left my husband of 14 years as he was pysically abuse to me.  Durin the separation i had a relationship  with some1 we both knew. The relationship was quick & serious, but wrong as he was married with kids.  He was prepared to leave his family for me.A few weeks ago i did a lot of heart searching and praying and realised that i cant hurt others 4 personal happiness so decided against the relationship & asked  him to stay with his family. I felt guilty and ashamed of my actions but knew i had done right by not encouraging the relationship any further. My husband also did alot of heart searching & realised his mistakes, he attempted to reconcile with me at this point as well and me being a soft person agreed. Altho he was the cause of our breakup i felt like i owed it to him as i had an affair.  I feel like a bad person for doing what i did. Im happy and tryin to come to terms with my mistakes but cant as i wasnt honest abt my affair to my husband. i didnt tell him that we were intimate. Im ashamed of my behaviour as i was a very upstanding and religious person.  i feel like i failed the world. The biggest problem being the other guy refuses to let go, he feels we shuld be together & that we gave our partners a try, so now leave them & b together.  i dont believe this i want him to make his family happy and i want to do the same.I may still care abt him but i feel my christian principles and being decent is more important to me.  I will not be able to live with myself if i hurt others in attempting to make myself happy.Thats not my charcater, i feel sorry for evry1 all i want is to be happy! Can some1please help me, how do i stop being so sad all the time.I regret what i did and want to make peace with myself i dont know how to do this.