Why do people spend thousands on their wedding day when it is possible to get married for much less?

[bambiboo78]

You can get married in a registry office for under £200

so why do people say they can't afford to have a wedding?

I have a cousin who postponed her wedding this year as they couldn't afford the money for her big day, but why didn't she just get married in a small ceremony? Is this kind of ceremony seen by people as not a proper wedding?
I don't understand as surely the end the result is the same?

[tenrec]

It is a very special day for most people. I personally would not spend more than necessary on it.

[emmie]

i wouldn't spend anything on it, i would get his folks to foot the bill x

[rowanwitch]

Because you want people to share in your joy... and because it is a major rite and traditionally these were marked with feasting etc.... personally I intend to spend enough to make it special but not so much that I am frightened to look at the bank statements for the next year... Not going as mad as my sister second mortgage to pay for hers she admits to around £20K my best guess is nearer £30K

[jackthehat]

It does seem that some people are so focused on the wedding that they don't give due consideration to the marriage which follows it.......

[tenrec]

Couldn't agree more Jack

[Nibble]

Most people think that this is a VVV special day for them, and wish it to be shared by as many of their friends & family as possible, hence the wish for a really big party, and as such these cost a lot of £££ in the current climate. Also you need to have lots of people in the pictures for FB, etc.... Hence again more ££££, and on we go!

[venator]

I did the register office / local restaurant the first time, and the big church / bellringers / choir and professional singer / yellow Rolls / big reception etc at local manor house.

It was what the ladies involved wished, and I felt just as married each time.

[rowanwitch]

It seems I will have to budget for a lot of cake and Gin

[bambiboo78]

I agree Jack,
I know people who want to get married they have kids together live together etc they are married but just don't have the bit of paper as 'they can't afford the big day'
the thought of a big day fills me with dread lol think i'm gonna just go off to gretna green & screw the relatives :)

[emmie]

rowan, surely a lot of gin and one cake..

[rowanwitch]

Depends who is coming....I have this vision of Boo, Craft and Fluffy turning up with empty plates and glasses

[gness]

A friend had a daughter getting married. As we are all involved with Thirld World Charities spending a huge amount was not on. We all contributed to the wedding preparations. Gran made the cake. My daughter decorated it. We decorated cars and used the talents we had where we could. Bride`s family are musicians and were delighted to play for the couple. Being involved in the preparations was much more special that just turning up as a guest. It is still the most memorable and beautiful wedding I have attended. And on a very low budget.

[tonyav]

You have just taken me back a few years there rowan '' empty dishes and glasses''. Reminds me of Junior school at breaking up for school hols at Christmas time. The class party when we had to bring a tin of fruit or something like that and your own dish, spoon and plate.

[grasscarp]

It is because a lot of people get married because they want a big wedding, and not have a wedding ceremony because they want to get married.
I wanted to be married and we had a register office ceremony. I bought the dress, flowers and ring on the day itself (didnt want to waste money until he confirmed that morning that he definitely wanted to get married). Champagne and cake at my sisters and all out to a restaurant that night. Still married 34 years later. Would I do it all again the same way? Like a shot but maybe with a different man!

[woofgang]

what jth said.

[Old_Geezer]

"Why do people spend thousands on their wedding day when it is possible to get married for much less?"

Because the only point in having a wedding is to have an excuse for a Fosters-up and holiday and stuff.

"You can get married in a registry office for under £200 so why do people say they can't afford to have a wedding? "

Maybe they can't afford £200, or maybe they realise the £200 is spent on the pointless stuff.

"I don't understand as surely the end the result is the same?"

Hardly. In one case you get the Fosters-up and holiday, and in the other all you get is a piece of paper.

[craft1948]

Did someone mention gin?

[rowanwitch]

Your sidekicks will be along shortly Its a shame we can't have some AB'er there on the day as it was AB brought us together and helped us along the way

[Smowball]

Screw the relatives? I'm sure thats illegal? ; 0

[chaptazbru]

Or you could go on 'Don't tell the Bride' and they'll give you £12,000 for the gtoom to plan it!