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How to Fix This Spat
21 Answers
Your husband is going to Staples to buy glue for your daughter. You specifically ask him when he will be home. He replies that he is going there and back. He arrives home 3 1/2 hrs later and is surprised that I am irritated. He says he thought I would be asleep so he didnt think it would matter when he came home or that he hadnt called to let me know he would be late. He is mad because 1) that I am irritated at all
2) that I didn't call HIM if I was worried
3) that I didn't appreciate the fact that he let me relax today while he looked after the kids because if I did I wouldn't be mad right now.
I am now MAD because
1) if he didn't want to call for ANY reason, he should have just come home.
2) because I asked him where he was "I don't make sense".
3) assumes because I asked the horrible question "where were you?" that I want to start a fight because there is no difference between irritated and angry.
Any thoughts regarding this matter. Would love to hear a solution.
2) that I didn't call HIM if I was worried
3) that I didn't appreciate the fact that he let me relax today while he looked after the kids because if I did I wouldn't be mad right now.
I am now MAD because
1) if he didn't want to call for ANY reason, he should have just come home.
2) because I asked him where he was "I don't make sense".
3) assumes because I asked the horrible question "where were you?" that I want to start a fight because there is no difference between irritated and angry.
Any thoughts regarding this matter. Would love to hear a solution.
Answers
The solution is not to make mountains out of molehills, put it in the past, be the adult one and forgive, and both learn what annoys the other and how the other ticks so one can be more compatible in the future.
07:39 Wed 05th Sep 2012
so now he left your 6 yr old waiting outside on her own for 3 hours?
you didnt mention that in the op ....
if that was the case, why would be now be confused as to why you were irritated, worried, and asking him where he was?
and why would he think it didnt matter what time he came home?
id have thought if that happened, hed know exactly why you had asked and not only understood why you were angry, felt terrible and apologised profusely to you and your daughter...
why didnt the school ring you to see why no-one was there?
how would you know he didnt ring if you were asleep?
you didnt mention that in the op ....
if that was the case, why would be now be confused as to why you were irritated, worried, and asking him where he was?
and why would he think it didnt matter what time he came home?
id have thought if that happened, hed know exactly why you had asked and not only understood why you were angry, felt terrible and apologised profusely to you and your daughter...
why didnt the school ring you to see why no-one was there?
how would you know he didnt ring if you were asleep?
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