Divorce & Entitlement

[jellybeangal]

My h'band of 5 1/2 years has asked for a divorce as the 'marriage has run it's course'. No one else is involved & no kids.

When we met I owned my own property which I sold & used 30k to put down as a deposit on a joint property plus 9k to cover the fees & paid to furnish the house.

I paid off a 3k car loan for him plus some of a 5k credit card debt. He was renting & had 9k in savings.

We married 2 months later.

He earns in excess of 41k a year plus a forces pension of 6k while I earn 8k.

We have had joint endowment policies since 2000 (in his name until then) & we have half shares in a small business although he has the business accnt in his sole name.

We wants 50% from the sale of the house & says as it was a short marriage I cannot expect much from his pension or endowment policies.

I have tried to appeal to his 'better nature. & suggest I have more than 50% of the house in which case I wld not ask for part of his pension or endowments, but he will not have it.

He wants us to agree without involving solicitors to keep the costs down but I am going to get legal advice.

I am so worried about it all, it's a first for me but it's his third so he's quite shrewd about it all.

Any advice to put my mind at rest please?

[lady_p_gold]

Well this is a very worrying time for you, and it seems he is hoping that you will just agree to what he says. It is a short marriage, however I think that might act in your favour as regards to the property, as when you get divorced they do ask what each partner brought marriage and then everything is put in a pot and divided either by agreement or by the Court. The fact is that your earning power is considerably less than his, and that has to be taken into account. I think that you need to get a solicitor, which although will be a little expensive, in the long run in your case I think it will be well worth it - and I can understand that he wants to do it without solicitors, because I think you are in a stronger position than he is and may get quite a bit more than you are offering to take. Unfortunately it is not pleasant but you must match shrewd with shrewder as you have put a lot of your money into the property and will not have much chance of doing the same again with your salary. He is making the point that its a short marriage and yet not recognising your contribution - forgive me for being a little cynical, but it seems a little odd you have done all that for him and then suddenly 'the marriage has run its course' - that might be something your solicitor might want to think about !

[jellybeangal]

Thank you for your reply lady-p-gold & I do not think you sound cynical one bit, in fact I have been thinking along the same lines especially as, & I forgot to put this in my question, I have also just spent 15k from an inheritance from my Mother, to make home improvements.

I suppose this will count for nothing as the house is still a joint asset, but it has left me feeling sick to my stomach that someone I trusted could behave like this.

I guess the saying is 'live & learn!'

[joeange]

You mentioned that you sold a house and put down the deposit, you may get this extra money if you can prove you put down the deposit, if not and everything has to be spit 50-50 then you will automatically get his share of pensions etc.

I dont know how much you earn but it will definately be worth getting a solicitors advice and you may even get legal aid! Your husband is obviously an expert, so make sure your one jump ahead of his game.

Good luck!!

[lady_p_gold]

Well actually things do not have to be split 50/50 as many husbands will tell you !!!!

[Hgrove]

The court has discretion to split the assets between the parties fairly, so I suggest you tell your solicitor everything you have written here; perhaps you could write a list and take it with you when you meet the sol so you don't forget anything. Best of luck!