my daughter seems to be displaying sexual behaviour at 6?!

[samritchie]

My daughter is almost 7, and i found her with her cousin who is 4, a few months ago, naked, with him on top 'cuddling'.. I told them both calmly to stop, and then explained that that was something that only grown ups do that are in love and for them not to do it again.

They went away looking a little sheepish but promised not to do it again. well it seems that they are at it again, only now in secret... i keep a very close eye on them but we live together so it is hard to know where everyone is every second of the day!

What shall i do? Has someone come across this? Is 7 too young to talk frankly about sex? I have asked her if she had seen it from somewhere or has someone shown her and she just says no to both.... Any suggestions?

[boxtops]

I wouldn't make too much of it if I were you - this isn't about sex, it's about copycatting, and they have no idea what they are actually imitating. I would give them something else to think about if I were you - don't make it out to be a special thing at this stage, just say to your daughter that taking your clothes off isn't a way to play. You've made it an exciting mystery by saying that only grownups do that - I'd just ignore it and give your daughter plenty of distractions, perhaps with someone else to play with.

[yelenots]

When my children were little I caught my son who was probably about 8 at the time, in bed with his sister who is 18 months younger and her friend - all with no clothes on!! I was shocked but just explained that they should not really do that! Never caught them again!

[andy-hughes]

It's very easy to put adult perspectives on childish behaviour - and this is not the sexualised behaviour that you are thinking.

Children like to experiment, and one of those curiosities is who people feel without their clothes on - and that is all they were finding out.

As advised, you should emphasise that playing without clothes is not good - if only because they will get cold - if you make this something more than it is, you will replace idle curiostiy with a desire to explore something forbidden.

It is a natural part of development, and nothing to worry about at all.

[fairycakes69]

I totally agree with andy, its just a phase that they go through, my boys at 4 went through playing with their 'bits' all the time. It just the adults that seem to make it worse by their reaction, andy is right don't make a big deal of it and like he says just say they'll get cold with their clothes off, it will soon pass.