My 7 year old steals

[chillirabbit]

How can I stop my 7 year old son taking things from myself and his brothers?

[kilkenny]

Sometime despite  all explanantions, groundings and removal of privelages this behaviour cam continue and it may be necessary to resort to a slap across the legs or bottom.

I know in this PC world it is an unpopular thing to say but sometimes, just sometimes it is necessary

[shivvy]

It is really quite hard to believe that opinions like kilkennys still exist.  There is NEVER a reason to beat a child.  Children are exceptionally intelligent (just think about the skills that they learn in their first couple of years e.g. walking, speech etc)  They are also able to reason issues when they are explained to them by responsible adults.  As Andy says, you need to explain that it is wrong and what the consequences are.  Then, and just as importantly, you need to be consistant in following up on this. He will be a happier child when this is explained and demonstrated to him. Good luck.

Kilkenny - would you ever think it was appropriate for someone twice your size and four times your strength to hit you just because they didn't like what you were doing?  Would you suggest that repeat offenders do not be sent to jail, but are issued with physical beatings - perhaps public floggings?  Really - please think about what you are suggesting.  Beating a child says much much more about the parent than the child.

[kilkenny]

I thouught my views would get the neo liberals blood boiling. However a a lsat resort it is sometime necessary.

I stand by what I say and believe me, and as I have said as a last resort, it can and often does work.

 

I note one of the responses referred to beating. I in fact said slap. One thing I would add is that the worst behaved chioldren I come across in the working class area of East London wher I reside have parents who are social workers and school teachers who subscribe to the talk/talk reason/reason school of parenting who have no back up whatsoever when there child kops on that there is no real punushment should their behaviour continue as it is.

Oh well. Each to their own. I have only ever slapped my son twice and my daughter once in their 13 and year existence always with the desired outcome.

It is a horrible thing to do but sometimes necessary.

[chillirabbit]

Thankyou all for your thoughts on this problem.  I too, disagree with Kilkenny,  and am still searching for a breakthrough answer to this problem.  I have sat my son down on numerous occasions and talked  to him about this, and tried to get him to understand why this is wrong from several different angles, and have used a range of punishments including loss of priviledges and time out.  All of which he hates.  However, it may be worth pointing out at this stage, that he is being assessed with regard to ADHD at the moment.  So,  please keep those thoughts and ideas coming.

[kilkenny]

Chillirabbit

My friend recently had her son assessed for ADHD but whilst waitng for the assessment was advised by her doctor to "experiment" with diet and lifestyle. She found cutting out chocolate and the the notoriuous fizzy drinks helped a lot in regard to behaviour.

She also reveiewed items such as bedtimes, getting up times and the amount of television watched. The first two became more regulated and the television hours reduced. Again it helped but did not totally solve the issue.

I do hope this resolves itself for you soon

[chillirabbit]

hey kilkenny!

On this, I do agree with you.  In fact, as a family, we avoid all artificial colours, flavourings, preservatives and sweeteners amongst other things, and eat mostly organic food ( or whole foods). This did make a huge difference to my son's behaviour!  The other thing, which may be of use to your friend is that homoeopathy has also proved to be a very good route to normality. Indeed, the 'taking' problem is, at the moment the only aspect of ADHD that is presenting any significant problems. 

[kilkenny]

Chillirabbit

I will mention this to my friend.

One more thing my friend found helped when things were frantic - and yer I am serious - calming music in the background. She swears by Peer Gynt - not sure if the spelling is correct