late nights

[silly moo]

Went out for a quick drink last night about 10 ish.
There were 2 children (10 yrs about) in pub till 10:50 pm.
What do others think about this?
Poor parenting or am I just terriblt old fashioned?

[twiglet4frog]

little bit bad parenting and also most places that allow children usually request they leave at 9pm to allow the adult drinkers/eaters some quieter time

[ajcmum]

I think they should be at home in bed!!  Definitely poor parenting.  Up the road from me, there is a little girl about 3 or 4 who I can hear still playing out when I am in bed at 11 o'clock!!  That is bordering on neglect

[webby27]

very poor parenting in my opinion there is a little girl in my friends street who is only about 1 and a half who has been out side playing some nights till 9.30 ish being looked after by her 5 year old sis while her parents are drinking makes my blood boil they should be tucked up in bed

what do these people have kids for? think they need to get there prioritys straight

[rampart]

I don't think you're being old fashioned at all! I was in bed by 8:30 when I was ten. And it did not matter what the other kids did - I was sent to bed at half past 8. No debates!

[catra1]

poor parenting, parents probably arent concerned that it is an issue and probly are not aware that it will negatively affect their childs behaviour and concentration the next day!
When I was in Thaliand a few years ago there were some young children with their parents in a lady-boy strip bar thing with their parents - they were European (German or Dutch) one of the girls was about 6 and it was well past midnight- I could not believe it. The girl looked shattered and completley uninterested in what was going on- the parents seemed to be enjoying themselves and not really monitoring their child it was awful.
Catra

[sunflower68]

Catra that just beggars belief; poor kids.  In this country Silly Moo it's still hard to believe how selfish a handful of parents can be.  I have seen similarities in a local I used to frequent.  The parents appear to believe that because the (often precocious and worldly-wise) child appears to be wide awake and having fun, chatting away to the adults, then it's all fine.  How long will it take these dimwits to realise they are ruining their kids?  Or should we be grateful the children weren't left home alone whilst the parents went to live it up in Ibiza, or wherever?

[toecrusher]

its a few minutes past midnight in the uk , and i have just heard an obviously young child screaming its head off. Looking out of the window, i see a couple talking very loudly pushing a buggy.  trying to reassure the poor mite of about 18mths" we,ll be ome soon darlin" unbelievable!!!

[ShellyHall]

I was in Blackpool a couple of weeks ago.  After we'd been to the pubs we decided to visit an Arcade and "make ourselves a fortune".  Obviously it was late at night (possibly around midnight - although time is irrelevant after you've been to the pubs!).  There were several families in the Arcade with small children - some were asleep in buggies and some were being dragged around.  The little tots were obviously tired and just wanted to go home to bed, they were crying and mis-behaving.

I thought this was awful.

[boobesque]

call me old fashioned, but on a school night thats a bit unacceptable, its not so bad if its holidays and they are behaving themselves, but i'm not a fan of kids in pubs, not really a good environment where i live!!

[Chillum]

I don't think there's any place for children in pubs, especially after 9.00pm, in both their interests and mine. Who wants to expose their kids to smoke, bad language and drunks. I've seen babies in pushchairs in the pub up until chucking out time. The worst I've seen was about 6 weeks ago, and this shocked me to the core. A large group of people were in the pub during the 1st leg of the Liverpool v Chelsea Champions League tie. They'd all been at a funeral and were all very drunk. The pub was as noisy and raucous as you'd expect during a big match. These people had a baby with them, no older than 8 months. At one point in the evening I heard the baby crying, and turned 'round to see the father with the baby on its back trying to pour lager down it's throat. I still feel bad that I couldn't do anything about it, but one guy against 12 or so scumbags isn't good odds. It made me feel sick.

[Greenbhoy]

It's a bloody disgrace.

We sometimes feel we are being overly early with our children's bedtimes 18:30 -19:00 for our 2yr old and 19:30-20:00 for out 6 yr old (they get up later for special occasions like functions and birthdays) but if they don't get their 12-13 hours worth of sleep a night they are a nightmare the next day.

Aren't the pubs obliged to not let chidren be in a bar after a certain time by their licenses?

[libertie]

Can honestly say that I've never seen any children in a pub here late in the evening, and personally can't imagine why you would want to take them! I like to go to the pub with friends to relax and enjoy myself!  Think its totally different when you go abroad on holiday as most holiday resorts cater more for little ones - its usually always warm and most bars etc are outside!

Mind you I'm in Scotland so maybe our license laws are different from England!

[SASHAGREEN]

yes, that is definatly poor parenting! a child does not belong in a pub ! and keeping them out that late is cruel! the poor thing was probably tired!

[Emily Ball]

AJCmum and webby27 -please pick up the phone and ring the police if you know of children of this age who are out on the streets late at night, even if it is outside their own house.It is criminal neglect.

[Otrere]

I work for Asda (lucky me! - I have my reasons!!) till 11.30pm and I see folks in there with their little ones at that time of night. I agree with AJCMUM - they should be at home in bed.

In fact, when I finished tonight at 11.30 there were people in there with a girl aged about 5. Its not just weekends either, its days when they have school the next day. I really don't know what the parents are thinking? They obviously don't give a toss about their child's education suffering from lack of sleep.

[Peri]

A lot of kids nowadays do not seem to have a set bed time they just keep going until they drop.  The body then gets used to being tired in the morning and livening up in the evening.  Vicious circle.  

[acw]

I realise my comments will probably lead to a barrage of abuse but I'm going to risk it anyway...

I do totally agree that children should be in bed at a sensible time and that they should be watched carefully by their parents at all times and that children shouldn't really be in pubs anyway (past 7pm I'd say).  However, it seems no-one stopped to consider that this may have been a total one-off for that family.  Perhaps they were relying on someone else for a lift home and that person was late.  Or they were celebrating a birthday for example.  I'm not saying this makes it ok, I'm just saying that one incident of poor judgement doesn't make a couple totally poor parents.  (At risk of contradicting myself further, I will concede that in some circumstances it only takes one mistake to damage a child for life). 

toecrusher - the people in your neighbourhood, who you know better than I... is it possible that their car had broken down and they'd been forced to walk home?  Or that the child had been peacefully sleeping at a relative's/babysitter's house and they had collected the child to bring it home.  On the way the child had woken up perhaps. 

My point is that having children out late at night is not necessarily bad parenting.  We don't know the background circumstances.  Regularly allowing children to be up/outside late is clearly irresponsible - I do agree with all the comments about that. 

ctd...

[acw]

...ctd

Finally - Otrere - these people with children in Asda late at night... is there any chance that they are single parents and that the alternative is to leave the children at home alone?  In that case, I would rather that the children were dragged to Asda at midnight than left on their own in the house or the car.  I appreciate that I may be totally wrong, and I'm not questioning you're views.

In fact I'm not questioning anyone's views!  I agree that on the face of it, the behaviour described by silly moo did look like poor parenting.  I'm just suggesting that there may be more to it than that and we perhaps could bear that in mind.  Just a thought...

[Otrere]

ACW - you have raised some very valid points - my 31 mth old daughter normally goes to bed fairly early but has had late nights when we've been out somewhere (on those very rare occasions!).

Unfortunately in the case I mentioned, as people usually tend to shop on a weekly basis and usually the same day every week, you get used to seeing the same people week in, week out.

I have seen the same families (not single parents, but families) week in, week out, with their little one's - often more than one child - at roughly the same time of night (later on at night) every week doing their shopping.

These are some of the small handful of parents who are inconsiderate as to their children's health, education and wellbeing.

[acw]

It does seem a shame that one couldn't stay at home and look after the kids while the other pops to Asda.  I'm sad that I was wrong... I was hoping these parents had an obvious reason for behaving this way... it appears not! :-(