Reins For A 4 Year Old

[numnum]

Can anyone recommend a set of reins for a 4 year old escapee?

We've persevered for years with his escaping and tried them before but he just ended up in a tangle with his tantrums. Hoping now as he's older, even though still no change in behavior that the Reins will be something we can use on those days where we just know he's going to use every opportunity to run away

[boxtops]

I can't recommend, but I am so pleased to hear of a child in reins, rather than running loose.

[albaqwerty]

I really hate to ask why you feel the need to have a 4 year old in reins at all?
Are there medical issues?

[ummmm]

Wrist to wrist reins. He's too old, imo, for body reins.

[numnum]

Yes, he seems that old to be putting him on reins but he has no sense of danger and its very worrying that all he wants to do is run away but and wont listen if we shout at him and he just keeps going. Need to try them out and hopefully it might start to sink in that its dangerous.

I normally have a very tight hold of him but now he's bigger its harder to drag him along the road by the hand especially if I have a shopping bag in hand.

Fingers crossed they'll make a difference

[ummmm]

Sounds like a 'turn away for a second and they've gone' kinda situation...

[ummmm]

Safety is the main issue but at 4 I reckons he'd be able to escape them.

[albaqwerty]

oh, lawdy, an inquisitive child :-(

Wrist to wrist sounds like a very good idea.

[numnum]

I've been looking at the wrist reins but a bit worried as he's a fighter and would get tangled in them. I was hoping the reins would be easier to haul him back and pick him off the floor. (son has lots of behavior problems when out in public or people around him)

What would be your thoughts on this?

[cazzz1975]

http://www.crelling.com/WALKING%20REINS.html

crelling make excellent reins, the price is a bit eye watering but I suppose the peace of mind you get is worth it.

[Mamyalynne]

Have his behavioural issues been assessed, is he just feisty or may he be scared of crowds and busy places?

[albaqwerty]

mamya asked better than I could, I was going to ask what does your GP suggest?

Have you been sent to the right help to get advice/assistance?

[numnum]

He's got lots of behavior problems and is seeing specialists. He has no sense of danger so would just run into a busy road and not understand the danger and after a telling off would go straight back and run straight into the same road.

I usually take the buggy so I can get him in it and strapped in and I get a quick exit but I'm wanting to try and take him and walk along side the buggy in public places and see how he behaves in that situation.

He's a very good escapee. Can climb out child proofed windows, 4ft gates at the age of 14 months so always need to plan every move. He's still in his baby car seat because of the 5 point harness. Still cant trust him to be in a seat belt seat as he unplugs it and jumps around the car and opens the window.
Just cant risk anything really. That one minute we trust him he can do something dangerous that he could hurt himself

[cazzz1975]

quite a worry, he may grow out of it yet hopefully, is his development in all areas aside from this normal?

[ummmm]

Sounds like my son. Stair gates actually turned out to be more dangerous than their intentions!! It's hard work.

[albaqwerty]

I'd be scared witless.

Have you tried taking him for a quiet walk whilst wearing reins? eg, countryside/woodland area?
If so, how was he there?

[Mamyalynne]

Well as he is in the hands of specialists, you need to deal with the immediate safety issue first and you have had some good pointers to reins etc.

If the journey is not an urgent one and he starts to react badly, don't shout - say quietly 'If you cannot walk nicely we are going home' and mean it.

[dunnitall]

Can they not do blood tests for vitamin deficiency and things like that, often goes toward behavioural problems which might be helped by supplements, also of course intensive one to one training in the old fashioned way. Good luck you may need it and as for reigns IMO defo the right way to go, the child needs to know restraint and for you to have the upper hand, I do hope you find the solution.

[joeluke]

Reins should be used for toddlers who have just started walking - not 4 year olds

It's just not right when you see a mother with a child of this age on reins, it's as if the child is like a dog on a lead

You say "I normally have a very tight hold of him but now he's bigger its harder to drag him along the road by the hand especially if I have a shopping bag in hand."

Who is in charge here, you or the child? Hold the childs hand and if he tries to pull away and 'escape' then simply grip tighter so that he can't. Yes, he will probably not like it and kick up a fuss but you have to persevere.

If you excuse the pun - 'Get a grip'

[numnum]

Yes, I'm very paranoid. I cant have a proper conversation if I bump into someone without having both eyes on him. Its one of those things we try not to show but its such a hard thing not to. I'd rather be paranoid and overly than him running into a busy road.

We live out in the country which has its pros and cons. He's not seeing pavements, traffic etc like you would in the city and days to town are few because of the distance and really his behavior.

He is seeing the specialist next month. I'm trying to write down as detailed a summary of his behavior as I can to update them but its very hard unless your seeing him and the odd things he does. They have been noticing at nursery but not to the extent I have to deal with at home and out and about.

I've never heard of any tests, thats will be one thing I'll ask for at the next meeting. Is there anything else that I might not know of that I could ask?

He probably would get diagnosed with ADHD and me and my Mum would definitely say some sort of very mild autism


Yes, we needed those dog gates!!

[EcclesCake]

I think it is your empathy and understanding that are your more endearing qualities JL.