Quest to Conceive (Vol.2)

[mats01_99]

Hey folks, some of you may remember me posting Quest to Conceive a couple of months back, well there's been a development. Last month my wife was 2 weeks late and we started to get a little excited but almost hours before we were planning to go to Boots and buy a test she came on and we were both a little gutted. Anyway this month she was a day late and as we are going on our hols on Saturday she said we should do a test immediately (not sure why, but anyway!). Anyway to my amazement the test was positive. It was a two test pack so we said we'd do the other on Sunday morn., anyway that was positive as well. So I know it's very early days but what's the next step?, Should she go straight to the docs? Also, how strict has everybody on here been about the three month rule before telling everybody (I know I've told you but you're different!!!) She wants to tell her Mum which I agreed would probably be a good idea, but I couldn't tell my side of the family for 3 months. Any thoughts? (Sorry to go on, just wanted to tell somebody!!)

[shehin]

Why don't you keep it to yourselves till you come back from holiday, then think about going to the doctor and telling her mum.

As you say - it is very early days just now.

PS May I be the first to congratulate you both!

[blueeyedlass]

make a doctors appointment and they will set up a booking in appointment with a midwife , i never told anybody before the 12 weeks was up. wish you all the luck.

[OBonio]

Congratulations! We told the grandparents after 8 weeks, then everyone else on New Year's Eve (my wife wasn't drinking, which is VERY unlike her ;o). That was about 11 weeks. Up to 12 weeks is the norm though.

The next step is to go see the doc and he will confirm and set an expeted date of delivery. Then you'll get a visit from a widwife and they'll set a schedule for checkups and go through the whole process. They're usually really good!

[nfn]

You need to contact your gp surgery at about 8 weeks to arrange a booking appointment with the midwife. The midwife usually first sees mums to be at 10-12 weeks but there are forms your missus needs to fill in which are sent to the hospital to generate labels and paperwork so mum can be monitored and registered, this usually takes a couple of weeks to organise. At the booking appointment the midwife will give an EDD and go through everything in detail. Make sure mum and bump take a urine sample when visiting the midwife, every time as this will be checked as will her bp etc. WOOHOO TO YOU BOTH, I'M CHUFFED TO LITTLE RIBBONS FOR YOU xxxxxxxx

[nfn]

Oh and I told my parents, brother and best friend (QuibblingMed) at 3 weeks!!!

[spudqueen]

Congratulations! I know it's hard to contain the excitement, but Mr Spudqueen and I didn't tell anyone until I was 12 weeks. We didn't want to build up future grandparents hopes, or have to face a whole load of people if it all went wrong. It was quite nice having a little secret all to ourselves.

[sunflower68]

Aw mats how exciting for you both.  Very many congratulations!  If I had had any advice it would be for Mrs mats01 to follow her instincts.  She may well wish to see the doc now; I know I did, to make sure I was doing the right thing.  Get a list of when and where she should be going at which time of the pregnancy, ie when are check ups due. I never knew from week to week and this would have been useful.  I waited about 3 weeks too nfn!  I had to as I was a chef and work was strenuous.  

Don't either of you worry too much about the pregnancy, just stay health.  Laid back mommy = laid back babba.

[mats01_99]

Thank you all very much for the kind words. We will take the advice on board. The thing that cracked me up was apparently she's five weeks pregnant according to a website that works out the due date, yet we must have only conceived little after 3 weeks ago!, weird!! Is this correct?

[ann_h]

Yes, officially pregnancy is always calculated from the first day of the last period, approx 14 days before conception.

Have a look at www.paternityangel.com for great week-by-week info - although for some reason, they count the weeks from conception just to confuse you!!!

I would always want to wait till at least the 2nd period was missed (6 weeks after conception) before telling most people.

You should go to the doc IMMEDIATELY though, to get your care plan, and folic acid supplements straight away as this vitamin is relevant to the development of the spinal column which happens earliest in pregnancy.

[Otrere]

Yeah I'd make a docs appointment after the holiday - mind you I did that and all he said was "congratulations" - wasn't interested in testing me or anything when he knew I'd done home pregnancy testing kits. Just got told to make an appointment with the midwife.

I told my boss (in case there were complications and I needed time off work) and my mum and dad and sister. Hubby couldn't wait and told his mum and dad, auntie and uncle, and brother and then we left it to our family to tell everyone else (news soon travelled fast!). I told closest friends but that was about all.

AND BL**DY CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU!!

[Otrere]

Also try www.babycentre.co.uk - its fantastic and has been my lifesaver and parenting bible!!

You can get weekly email updates as to how your baby is developing and post on community forums and chat to other parents who are at the same stage of pregnancy as you so you can all share your experiences.

There is so much helpful advice and information on there.

I've made A LOT of friends on there and I talk to all the mums with children who were born in the same month as mine (nov 02) and we meet up once a year to have a big birthday party with all our littlies.

It really helps to be able to talk to folks going through exactly the same as you are are!!!

[loobie]

When my sister fell pregnant the first time she only told me, mum, dad, nan and grandad. her boyfriends family is so big that it would spread like flies and she didn't want that. She had a completely healthy baby. Next time she fell pregnant she told everyone straight away (as the last one was so healthy) and she unfortunately lost it. The third time she hardly told anyone again and unfortunately once again lost it. I think that if a baby is going to survive then it will, if it won't there is nothing that can be done.  The only thing with everybody knowing is the having to tell everyone that is has gone which isn't nice as it will make it worse for the two of you. Hope this helps somewhat and congratulations and all the best of luck.

[Louisebabe]

I would keep it to yourself until your wife is at least 12 weeks pregnant-i suffered 2miscarriages before i was 12weeks pregnant, both times telling everybody and anybody who would listen at the time. Not only that, its your personal time togethor as a couple, before everybody finds out about the pregnancy........good luck anyway to the both of you xxxx

[Cathy]

I must admit I told everyone straight away, and so did my hubby we were so excited! Luckily everything went well. I know it would be awful telling everyone if the worst happened, but I think it would be worse for me feeling that badly and not being able to tell anyone why. As for the doctor's appointment, I did two home tests, but made an appointment fairly quickly with the doctor and she told me when to make a booking in appointment. Different areas do things in different ways so it might be the best way to get any info you need. Finally, CONGRATULATIONS! Having kids is a great lesson in patience but better than you can imagine and I hope you get as much enjoyment as I have with my little boy.