Sleepless in Seattle (well actually, Alabama)

[HAnn521]

(but ya gotta love that movie)...

OK, my question is...Can anyone give me some great advice for curing restless, uncomfortable nights without sleep??

Recently, as some of you already know from my posts, I have been dealing with some disappointing doubts/troubles about my current relationship...as a result, I am trying to gain more independence from my boyfriend and start staying alone again instead of spending every night with him...

I live only with my dog, and I've just moved to a new place...lately, as I am trying to spend the night alone at my place and not with my boyfriend...I CAN NOT sleep well. I get restless, nervous, uncomfortable being alone...I often wake up many times if I go to sleep at all or have to sleep with the TV on...and small things begin to scare me...like noises, etc.

Please help me by sharing your feedback, thanks!

[jno]

yes, it's hard to sleep when your mind is turning events over and over. One solution of course is sleeping pills - I find Tylenol Simply Sleep helpful - you don't want to take them every night, but it can be worth having the odd one when you're really tired and still can't sleep, and starting to fall badly behind the amount of sleep you need.

As for noises, is there actrually anything to worry about? Are you in the middle of crack houses or anything? If not, then I suspect being scared is just part of your general worrying and doesn't need to be tackled separately.

And the long-term cure... well, the passage of time, I suspect. Reaccustoming yourself to your own company - or finding Mr Right. I know this isn't hugely helpful, but it's probably the best way none the less. It won't happen overnight, so to speak, as it does mean a substantial change in your life, but I know you'll be okay. Good luck.

[ICEMANSAV]

With you doubts about your relationship those insecurities have become ingrained into other areas of your life, such as noises etc. which are making you feel uneasy. A good suggestion ny jno but also other activities, such as going for a long walk with your dog and getting fresh air can help you sleep in the evening. A glass of wine or two will also help calm you nerves ( P.S . just in case anyone else says it, I don't mean getting drunk all the time ).

 

Have you got single female friends that would come over and have a night in with you?

 

You need to prove your independence to your b/f but also realise that life doesn't revolve around him, it merely featured him and that you can make your own life externally to you and him. ( might patent that last bit!)

 

Hope all goes well HAnn. Take care. ICEMAN

[Jules001]

sprinkle some lavender oil on your pillow or eat a lettuce sandwich before going to bed, both of which are calming and help you to sleep.

[nedflanders]

Hey HAnn do what I do and exercise yourself into the ground.  I sleep like a log now and also feel better and have more energy than before.

Sorry not for being too constructive.

P.s. How's the weather, getting better or worse?

[HAnn521]

Once again, all of you putting up with my recent distress have given me some wonderful responses!

jno: It was so funny to read that you have also discovered Tylenol Simply Sleep! I have used the stuff in the past and feeling that I had almost grown to acustomed to using it, I let it go for a while.

About the noises, I guess my new place is in a safe area, actually full of college students...but I moved from a totally new apartment building where I knew all of my neighbors, to an OLD house out of town that has been split and made into a duplex. The fact that it's a really old house creeps me out and gets my wheels turning at night when I'm alone...I guess I just need to grow up and conquer that one! But, in all, it's the safety factor I feel when he's staying with me that I miss.

ICEMAN: I agree with your suggestion, and I am not a big drinker, so no need to worry about that wine-drinking getting out of control...thank you for sharing with me again...I agree that I do not want my life to revolve around him...but only to feature him.

Jules: never knew that trick, thank you!

ned: Thank you as well...I do know that exercise helps you sleep better at night, and luckily I have already begun Yoga and will be taking classes throughout Sept.  Also, the weather is beautiful today...so weird! We had rain & wind overnight, that's all...

[Litchick]

Sometimes when I can't sleep I find that my ATTITUDE towards the situation helps.  Rather than fretting about not being able to sleep, I simple get up, go to another room and read for about an hour.  When I go back up to bed I fall fast asleep.  The trick is to not fear or worry about the sleepless night -- just "go with it".  It will finally come if not that night, then the next or the one after.  Like love, the more you chase it the further away it gets....in the meantime, follow all the other wonderful suggestions above.  xxx

[jno]

Good answer from Litchick: sometimes if I can't sleep I just get up and read or log on to AB... of course the only other person online at that hour is likely to be you HAnn! This won't necessarily work if you're fretting about having to be at work in 6 hours, but it's often worth trying to use your waking time productively.

[shaneystar]

i have trouble sleeping mainly due to aches and pains but I find routine at bedtime helps.I try to go to bed at a regular time.Do little routine things beforehand .Then a warm bath with lavender oil ,milky drink or camomile tea.Make sure your room is cool,no distractions....Turn that TV off!! Some relaxing music on a CD set to turn off after an hour say...or you can get these relaxation CD'S with the sound of waves lapping on the beach etc. The most boring book you can find....it's awful when you can't sleep.Hope things soon settle down .Good luck.Also I often start with A and work my way through the alphabet thinking of things begiining with A B and so on...names ,plants,places etc.

[shaneystar]

Got sidetracked half way through my post....I find by doing this I rarely get past B and drift off .Also I have found in the past that it was helpful to write down,things I had to do for the next day and things that were on my mind .Once I had them on paper I found I could relax more and not think about them again until the the morning.Sounds daft perhaps but helped me.

[HAnn521]

I'm sure many of you won't read this...but if you do...I wanted to tell you that I slept so much better last night! Last night, after a nice dinner and a movie...I got into bed about 10:30 and I was asleep by 11:30! ...and there was no waking up in the middle of the night, and no TV on...

that hasn't happened in a while and it felt good..I almost slept through the entire night peacefully, but I woke up about an hour earlier than the alarm for some reason, but laid in bed till it woke me again...

I think just having thought about all the things you all said helped me tremendously! Danke!

[ICEMANSAV]

Thats good news HAnn!

[jno]

hope you got through the night okay HAnn. So glad you escaped the storms - it's astonishing to read how hard they hit the south; we're used to seeing Caribbean islands devastated, but the USA usually gets off lightly, as people are better organised and more mobile, building standards are higher etc.