Friend

[jennyjoan]

Have a wonderful female friend - known her for 50 years - she married with 2 sons and daughters-in-law. Very happy married. Having said all that she does not get on with females at all - 2 daughters-in-law. Things have gone a bit awry this past few years for her and now I look at her with a different perspective. I never realised she was so deep and I mean this - I am the only female friend she confides in.

Over the years when her and I have been out socialising - when it came to females - she becomes literally dumbstruck.

I took it with a pinch of salt all these years and will do but I do wonder what her problem is.

She has said to me over the years - I envy you so much cos you can talk away. I have invited her to parties when I used to have them but she wouldn't come.

The most sincerest person you could meet. In fact she is the only friend who knows simply everything about me and I know it never went further than her.

[zebo]

I don't understand what you're asking really but I would say that your friend sounds a lot like me.
I have never understood the need to share every aspect of one's life with friends or even family, I don't think in my almost 70 years I have ever 'opened up' to anyone, even health scares I have always kept to myself on the principle that if it gets seriously serious then I might have to tell them but until then it's my business and mine alone.
When we lived abroad and 'socialising', horrid word, was expected I did that was expected and quite enjoyed it.
After working in a school for almost 20 years, on the day I retired I walked out and didn't even go into the leaving do, I loathe situations that might put me in the metaphorical spotlight.
Probably people think I'm an odd ball and stand offish but I can live with that!
This is probably the most I've ever said about myself, the anonymity of the keyboard!

[jennyjoan]

good for you Zebo - and perhaps why I don't understand that - I am totally the opposite - I tell all and sundry cos I do like to embellish too LOL.

However, she is tinged with the utmost sadness and whilst I have just mentioned 2 d-in-laws. She literally reared their children from they were born until now and I do think part of the sadness today is she has found it difficult to let her grandchildren leave the proverbial nest that the grandchildren no longer call. I feel like throttling them all because she has been so kind to them all.

[jennyjoan]

sorry - do know that my posts are not making some sense - it's just the way I am feeling for her. I haven't seen her for about 2 months now as she is going through a bit of a hell at the mo - last time she cried sorely but she knows I am there for her.

[Mamyalynne]

At the moment I think you've nailed it JJ, her current melancholy is a form of empty nest syndrome, sometimes people see that as being no longer needed.

With you as a good friend with lots of your tales (embellished or not) she'll get through it.

[Jahulaye]

"The most sincerest person you could meet. In fact she is the only friend who knows simply everything about me and I know it never went further than her."

Aah.. I have a tear in my eye just reading that. I think you're both lucky to have each other in your lives xXx

[Toorak]

Zebo

I an empathise - your experience sounds like mine. I prefer privacy and dealing with things head on myself (which I have had to do over the last couple of very stressful years). Jj I your friend may be like us. Not a big deal - just different strokes for different folks

[jennyjoan]

Too True Too(rak) - but sometimes I think if she could lighten up a little then her world may lighten up too.

[ummmm]

A bit late for that I would say. She is the way she is, stop over analysing every situation and accept it.

[murraymints]

it's nice she has a friend like you Conne... just continue to be there for her xx

[waterboatman]

I was about to type what minty just has.

Make the most of your friendship and be there when she needs you, and she will!

[EcclesCake]

Poor lady, at a time of need she's is being judged by such a close friend.

I hope she finds solace and support in some quarter.

[murraymints]

what tosh ^ .. you are a friend indeed Conne...xx

[DTCwordfan]

How many true friends do we really have? Ones that we can share intimate details - I would put it to you that most people would be very lucky to have, say, three......

[gness]

Hi, Conne.....it's nice she finds support and a shoulder from you when she asks.......and that's the way some folk are.......you have to wait till they come to you and ask......sometimes in not many words but I know you will know when you're needed.......x

[Mamyalynne]

Sometimes opposites work in friendships, one outgoing and chatty - the other more introvert.

If you rub along there's really no need to try to change anything.

[EcclesCake]

Ho hum, spoke out of turn again and got shot down in flames by the usual suspects.

Ho hum.

[gness]

That's so true, Mamya........and as I'm the quiet one it'll work well when Conne and I meet up.......you can chat away, Conne!... ;-)

[DTCwordfan]

Name the police, Sergeant Dixon (Dock Green), Inspector Imbookingu and who else?