ChatterBank10 mins ago
Elderly Parent Dangerous Driving
18 Answers
Hi My dad who is coming up to eighty still drives a car. I went out with him the other week, and was shocked how poor his reactions are , to potential dangerous situations. He doesn’t check his rear view mirror before pulling out and regularly had cars honk their horns causing him to get angry and shout. I tried to approach the subject gently but he see he’s doing nothing wrong. I’m worried he will have an accident. I’m not sure what to do. Do you have any suggestions please?
Answers
The IAM offer a "Mature Driver Review" for £65. They sit in your car whilst you drive in your local area and give you an assessment as to whether you are still fit to drive. You could suggest that your father undergoes such a review to prove that he's as capable as he thinks he is. https://www. iamroadsmart .com/courses /mature-driv er-review
08:17 Sat 25th Jun 2022
The IAM offer a "Mature Driver Review" for £65. They sit in your car whilst you drive in your local area and give you an assessment as to whether you are still fit to drive. You could suggest that your father undergoes such a review to prove that he's as capable as he thinks he is.
https:/ /www.ia mroadsm art.com /course s/matur e-drive r-revie w
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Very difficult. I always contemplated giving up my driving licence when reaching 80, but as Providence stepped in and rendered me permanently unable to drive safely (TIA resulting in permanent sight problem) a month or so before the fateful day, the need to make the decision never arose. Had the occasion occurred I have some doubts as to whether I would have followed my intentions, my driving seemed OK, and I deliberately made allowances for slower reaction times (but not covering emergencies obviously). I had considered the IAM review and would possibly have gone ahead, but now I can't of course. And my Neurosurgeon stressed the permanent nature of the ban, so no redemption likely unfortunately.
As to the answer to your problem, I suggest regular "nibbling away" at the issue and it may begin to sink in. It is very hard to give up driving - even in my case where I had good intentions, I was actually devastated when it was forced upon me. But I've come to terms with it now, "it is what it is".
Can you make any helpful overtures to your father as to how you could soften the blow for him (without offering an on-demand taxi service of course).
P.S. Sorry for rambling on a bit about me me me, but I thought it might give some insight as to what your father is facing.
As to the answer to your problem, I suggest regular "nibbling away" at the issue and it may begin to sink in. It is very hard to give up driving - even in my case where I had good intentions, I was actually devastated when it was forced upon me. But I've come to terms with it now, "it is what it is".
Can you make any helpful overtures to your father as to how you could soften the blow for him (without offering an on-demand taxi service of course).
P.S. Sorry for rambling on a bit about me me me, but I thought it might give some insight as to what your father is facing.
I will find it very hard to give up driving if & when that time comes. Maybe with your father you could determine where and when he drives & what alternatives exist for other modes of transport.
e.g. I drive to Aldi for my shopping but there is a Spar shop I can easily walk to - it's costlier but probably not so much if I didn't have the expense of a car.
A neighbour with a BMW was doing about 3000 miles per year. She sold the car & now uses buses & taxis.
Maybe if he lives apart from friends & family he could consider a house move. We all need to make adjustments as we get older.
e.g. I drive to Aldi for my shopping but there is a Spar shop I can easily walk to - it's costlier but probably not so much if I didn't have the expense of a car.
A neighbour with a BMW was doing about 3000 miles per year. She sold the car & now uses buses & taxis.
Maybe if he lives apart from friends & family he could consider a house move. We all need to make adjustments as we get older.
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