Checky, rude or sadly truthful

[Melbur]

I went swimming today had a great time, feel great want to go again next week but was very upset to be called FATTY by a little boy of about 4 or 5. was there anything I could of said back or to his mother?

[nect4r]

Hi Melbur, I'd love to know the answer myself.. but I just wanted to send a virtual hug.. I know exactly how you must feel and it's awful.

Keep your head held high and (I know it's hard) ignore the little you know what.

[Melbur]

Thank you nect4r, That's real kind of you, your virtual hug has made me feel better.

[Pippa68]

If it had been me I wouold have told him he was very rude. Was his mother there, or at least in earshot?

If so..shame on her!

I was once called a 'stupid fat bitch' by a girl in a taxi going by..unlucky for her the taxi turned round to go the other way up the road & had to stop at some traffic lights. I bounded over to the taxi, asked the taxi driver if he was going to eject his rude, vile passenger & she quickly said she was talking to her friend in the back seat!

I retorted that I may be fat, but she was ugly & at least I could diet :o)

[dancealot13]

Sometimes I think you just gotta give it right back !!!

I was on a subway during rushhour in NYC. It was totally packed and this little boy (10) yelled at the top of his voice..."You have huge eyes, oh my gosh mom, she is scary looking" At first I didn't think he was talking to me, but then he got closer. I said to the kid "If I scare you so much then don't look at me!" he kept yelling and the mother did nothing. A male passenger next to me said.."Don't worry, little boys do this when they're young if they think a girl is pretty". Well I don't care WHAT the reason was, I was offended.

My eye teeth are kinda sharper then most people, but you wouldn't notice it unless I pointed them out, My boyfriend thinks its cool ;) So anyway, I told the boy "You think my eyes are scary?? Well Look at my TEETH." He yelled "Oh my god Mom, she has Shark teeth". I said "Hunny! These Are not Shark teeth....they're Vampire Teeth, and if you don't leave me alone Im gonna BITE YA!!!" he left me alone after that.

Two weeks later a little girl stopped me on the subway during rushhour, and said at the top of her voice..."I like your shoes!!", I said "thank you hunny", and then she said "I Love your Hair!!". lol ;) I said thank you, and it made my day!

[Melbur]

Thanks Pippa68, Their very skinny mother was nearby and would have heard any retort I made, I agree I should have said "that's rude" but I so lack confidence that I just about managed to hold my head up high as nect4r suggested, your experience was very brave, good for you

[andy-hughes]

Sadly, experience confirms that overtly rude children usually have rude parents, because they don't think the child is wrong, and offer no correction. You would simply have got into a pointless argument with an ignorant woman about her ignorant child. The only way is the dignity of silence, and knowing that you may one day be slim if you chooose, they will always be ignorant and unhappy, and have no choice about that. Who wins? You do, every time.

[electricblue]

Andy-hughes you have a knack of making people feel better,bless you,and it aint even my thread!!

[andy-hughes]

Thank you electricblue, that's very kind.

Are you a lady? If so, a kiss for you, if you are a man, then a gruff manly punch on the arm, followed by a change of subject to rugger, or beer, or soldiers.

(Actually, I hope you are a lady!)

[nik1971]

melbur i truely sympathise with you,after years of battling with anerexia and bullimia i now weigh 19stone and am struggling to lose it but am a much better person than the 6stone self obsessed person i used to be.i have had numerous comments....(backhanded of course) about my weight over the years and have learnt to hold my head up high as i know that im a good person whatever size shape or weight i am,and i have found the best thing to do is laugh along with them!

a year or so ago a "lady" made a comment to her friend in the queue behind me in kfc with regard to my size and the amount of food i was ordering (i was actually ordering for 16 people) i turned to her and told her i was very hungry and i hadnt eaten for an hour then turned round and ordered more!

its a great shame that the little boys mother could not have given him a bit of a nudge in the right direction of an apology and explained to him what a sad and boring world we would live in if everyone looked the same and how damm right rude it is to make comments to people about their apperance.

hold your head up high melbur ,get your cosi washed and dried for next week and go get em girl!

nik.x

[SaxyJag]

Believe me, when you've been called a fat cow by more fifteen year olds than you care to remember (whom you were trying to help at the time), being called fatty by a five year old is nothing.

At four or five, this child was probably just repeating something he heard at school and really doesn't know better. If you know his mother heard and didn't reprimand him, you could try saying something like, "yes, but you/some people are ugly, and I can go on a diet," in a very loud voice.

[unruliejulie]

melbur, don't let the ignorance of a few prevent you from enjoying things like this. Unfortunately, there are many children like this around these days, and adults! rise above it and hold your head high. andy hughes is spot on (again) i am a great believer in what goes around comes around, one day maybe these hateful children will be on the recieving end of something similar.Big hug from me too xx

[vicalncraig]

Most kids tell it how it is, what is rude/cheeky to an adult, is just honesty to a kid. Don't take it to heart...we are what we are.

[Melbur]

Thank you everyone who has posted something today, I agree with the two of you that said "He didn't know what he was saying, or He just stating the obvious as only a child could" but it spoilt my good time, All the encouraging commemts are great, bags packed ready to go this friday. Hugs & LOL. especially to nik

[kazzianne]

Hi melbur.I cant believe that there are some children who are brought up with such disrespect - and then for the mother to not say a thing amazes me!

If my little boy had said such a thing(not that he ever ever would) I would have marched him up to you to apologise profusely .

If I had been in your shoes I think I would have gone up to the mother,and asked if she had heard what her son had said.If she had said yes,then I would have said that it was very sad that she couldnt bring her child up to know even basic manners and she should be ashamed of herself.Then I would have left it at that.Maybe not the right thing to do,but I would have to let her know that his behaviour had hurt my feelings.

Big big hugs to you and you keep on swimming!!

[Goodsoulette]

aaarrrrghhhh!!! thats put me off swimming this morning.

[Melbur]

goodsoulette, don't be put off, I've had some lovely support from everyone here and definately going again on Friday, Thanks for the hug kazzianne

[Goodsoulette]

I was only teasing... I went like I did every other morning!! I dont give a rats arse whether a 4 or 5 yr old thinks I am fat. I expect his mum was embarrassed and thats why she didnt say anything.

[CLOWN TICKLE]

It happens to me all the time, to the point Im reluctant even to walk the dog especially if youths are about, I am trying to ignore it

[Melbur]

Thanks Goodsoulette, I'm rubbish at spotting a teasing but your upbeat comment encouraged me and I hope Clown Tickle that you have been inspired by them too, be strong you must let anybody stop you doing what you want to do, you're as good as them and proberly better x

[Melbur]

Sorry spelling mistake should read "you mustn't" melbur billy silly