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elainejo50 | 19:32 Sun 01st Oct 2006 | Parenting
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has anyone out there just had their son/daughter go off to university for the first time. If so would like to hear how you are coping. The weekend i just couldn't stop crying everytime someone asked me how he was doing am i sad or what. Would like to hear from others on how they coped
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In some ways it's like coping with a grief reaction, and don't let anyone tell you you're being silly. I missed my son so much when he went to uni. It was worst at mealtimes, when I'd wonder what time he was going to be home...and thne suddenly realise that he would be home at all. And bedtime, when I'd hesitate before putting the hall light out in case he wasn't home yet...and then realise again that he wouldn't be home. And I so missed hearing his music coming from his room.
But, like any other grief reaction, I got over it. Especially when he started to send interesting emails which made me laugh.
Don'y feel bad about yourself, or silly - a lot of people feel this way and you will get over it.
Hi...Im not the parent, Im the 23yr old son! I just wanted to say. There was a period I was away studying for two years, and my mum being a mum is a huge softy and always gets emotional when I or my sister leave. All i can say to that is, Im glad! Not in a sick way, but clearly youve got a good relationship with him and you love him. It just shows how much you care and that youre a good mum! doesnt make you sad or any less of a person. what you should know too is, we might not always admit it, but we miss our mums heaps too! but I didnt say that...! hope you feel better about it now ;)
awwww elainejo50 you must be feeling it. It's wierd, I remember my brother and me both went off 19 years ago(omg) -the same year cos he flunked his A levels and had to retake! Anyway my mum told me years later how she waited to wave as she and dad drove away but I had already gone into my new place. She cried the 200miles home.
It's something you don't understand until you are a parent - it was beyond me then. So was the fact that she would not sleep until I was home from a night out,I clearly remember asking her at the time why she didn't just go to bed.
Now I am a mum of 2 I see it coming full circle and how fast the years go. 10 more and I will be the one in tears. I am sure you have cherished all those years being a busy mum so enjoy the fact that your son has turned out so well and he will always have you there for him.
I know it doesn't stop you missing him but thank goodness for texts and emails these days. Keep your chin up. xxx
Hi there. Im a mum of 3 and my eldest has just gone off to uni for 3 years. Although she left home last november and therefore the wrench wasnt so painful, I went through it when she left home. It is a kind of grieving which gets better and easier in time only. Dont be hard on yourself, its a perfectly normal reaction to your baby growing up and needing you still but in a new way.
When I took mine to College I was carried back to my student days, remembering what a good time I had, and the friends I made. And my Mum welcomed them all in the vacs (we lived near London so lots came to stay)
Happy days.

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