msn

[lynneylou]

is your teenage son/daughter always on msn, do you give them rules regarding this etc? our 13 yr old is allowed on for max 5 days per wk, max 2hrs aday, but i am always on edge when she's on as i have been told that in the past she has used very crude addi names! have spoken about this to her and said that if i find out she has used foul language on there again, i will take msn off computer. Is this fair?

[ganesh]

Hi,
My daughter was always on msn and I hated it. At first I thought it was great because she could chat with all her 'friends'until she became obsessed with it,and tarted herself up every night for the webcam. The language on it is appalling and the worst thing is that some of them hack into others accounts and spread rumours ,pretend to be the other person and cause mayhem!
It's just one more thing to argue about and worry about isn't it?
They all do it though and I wouldn't stop it if I were you,just make sure the homework is all done each evening before going on it and make sure it goes off at 'bed-time'.
Depends how strict you want to be,I suppose.
How's that other little matter with the 16yr old guy going?

[sophieb]

hi lynneylou! My two kids get one hour of EITHER tv, computer or playsation a day and even thats after they have done their homework and the dishes! They do a lot of out of the house stuff anyway and to be honest they only use the tv, playstation or computer if they have nothing better to do! There are no complaints about it as their choices are accept the rules or do without. I know of some kids at their school whos parents claim they cant get their child to do anything cos all they want to do is watch tv or play computer/console games for anything up to 4 hours a night!(or more)!!

[noxlumos]

We are very liberal with our kids, they are largely self determining with regards to how long they spend on it, but they all use it and always have, no harm ever having come to any of the ones who are now adults, so it really doesn't worry me that much as I trust my kids. I honestly think that the stricter you are, and more forceful in stamping your attitudes and opinions onto kids, the more trouble you end up having with them. At this age they are learning about who they are and need some leeway to develop themselves, so I never snoop, pry or interfere but I'm always there for them. So far we've never had any major problems, touch wood.

[lynneylou]

hi thanks for all answers. ganesh, she still texts him when she has credit, i just keep reminding her about her reputation, morals,whether or not he shows txts from her to his mates etc. thanks for asking

[rosie posie]

please please ,,pleeeeeeease remember ,you are the adult and they are children ,,never mind these do gooders with there give them there freedom ****,every child is different but i have my computer in the living room,because whether your blessed with sensible children or not,they are children ,,too much to young at the moment i think .im only 30 and have a 14 year old son ,and i had ,and have a strong will. but i do wish my mum had been more stronger when i was young.and put her foot down,because i didnt know my own mind at that age ,so please dont let them peer pressure you because remember they are being peer pressured too,so you have to be the one whos strong .trust me she will thankyou when shes older..hope all goes well and always try and talk to her.its hard but try and try and try again.good luck xxxxx

[thingummyjig]

hi after replying to your previous query, I've come to realise that our daughters must be cloned!! YES THIS IS VERY FAIR! Dont let her convince you otherwise! lol We too had to limit her msn time after having problems. (The silly little B*gger had a password hint as 'who do I fancy?'; some other little s*d, hijacked her account as, of course EVERYBODY knew who she fancied! Then they changed her msn name to something very unsavoury; offering sexual favours with her mobile number, and changed her password so she was not able to change her own name back) KIDS!
This resulted in us taking internet connection from her room, only now in communial room, and she gets 1 hour every other night, after she's cleared the pots! This also solved the problem of us adults never getting on the pc! Hint * try to find out if she has a myspace site in her name; my daughter put her own quiz on, which revealed our address, phone number and other personal details! argh! Good luck!