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tooyym | 14:21 Wed 27th Oct 2004 | Parenting
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how can i find out if my daughter is pregnant with out asking her
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I don't think you can..what makes you think that she is?
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Hello,

Thank you for your answer.

My daughter has complained of feeling sick, appears very tired, has asked me if I would like another baby, her bible has been marked on Psalms regarding bad behaviour, abortion.

The above I realise do point to pregnancy, however, she has also very recently lost her 18 year-old step-sister to Leukaemia, which again could cause a few of the symptoms above.

We are close, however, like all teenagers when pressed she backs away.

My daughter is 14 years old, would she be able to have an abortion without me knowing.

 

Your best bet is to sit down and ask her, show her you support her. After all, you don't want her to have to deal with it all alone if she is do you? When i found out i was pregnant the first person i wanted was my mam. She may think that she can't tell you becasue you would be angry with her, but by gently approaching her and showing your love and support, she will open up to you and you can deal with it together. Hope everything is ok.
My advice is to ask her take her shopping or have a girlie day out with her and make her feel at ease and maybe this might bring up the subject with her. It worked with my mum when i was 16 she knew I was on the pill but could not approach me so she took me out and then asked me. If you can try not to make out that you have only just taken her out to find out if she is pregnant. It is a hard one and i do not envy you I do not hink she can have abortion without you knowing. Do you know if she has a boyfriend or is having a sexual relationship? maybe this is your first piont of call.
Wait 9 months?
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yes she can have an abortion without you knowing, my friend had an abortion when she was15 and regrets it ever since if her mum had asked her if she was and offered her support i think it would have been a very different story and would not be living with this regret!!

Good luck be strong x  x

personaly i would ask her whats going on. im a 14 year old girl and if my mum thought i was pregent i would prefer her to ask me about it. i know she will proberly getting really upset or really angry beacuse you thought that she might be pregent but inside deep down i still think that she liked it that you knew or that you cared. thats how i would be if i was in the situation as your daughter. just sit her down carmly and ask her in a really nice way, beacuse if ti was true that thats the best way to do it if not then she will still like it that you care. hope this helps give me a shout if you want some more help as i can kind of put myself in her shoes. xx
As someone previously mentioned, if your daughter is pregnant, she's probably scared to death of telling you, and would be appreciative if you were the one to bring up the subject.  Maybe you could do it in a casual, non-threatening (or even light-hearted?) way...perhaps take her shopping at the drugstore (chemist's) and as you're filling your basket, take a home pregnancy test from the shelf and ask her "do we need to buy one of these?" 

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