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getting custody of children

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barney11 | 20:34 Mon 05th Oct 2009 | Parenting
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hi i have been with my wife for 13 year we have had big rows about the way she lives dirty knicker left on floor. she never put any thing a way and for year i have cleaned up after her and when we moved house she said she would be more cleaner but never has we have two kids she does not work and ever day i come home there the house is a tip i have come home one nite my little girl of three was running around with a bleach bottle with no lid on i took it off her all so come home and found safety pins in her mouth. and the list go on we are splitting up and i do not want to her to have kids i have photos of the state of house and thing that sould be out off the way off little finger but if i tell s services about it becuse we are splitting up thay may say i put them there all will take kids away
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You need to get specific help for this problem. Have you been to CAB? It is free, and they ought to be able to point you in the right direction. Do you have any friends or family who can back up what you say? I am not familiar with the Family Court system, but if you are making a formal application for separation, then official arrangements must be made for the children. If they really are at risk and you can prove it then Social Services should be taking this seriously. Which of you instigated the splitting-up? How are you both planning to live when it happens? Do you own a home which will have to be sold? If you want to have custody of the children, how will you look after them during the day if you are working? You might find yourself in the position of having to move out of the family home, pay for somewhere else to live, and still pay for the upkeep of your wife and children. You really do need to be very up-to-scratch on the implications of what you are up against.

These are all questions which you must get very clear answers to. Ideally you should have a Solicitor to represent you, but they can be expensive. There are two organisations where you might get some help. They are:
www.FathersMatter.com
and
Families Need Fathers - www.fnf.org.uk

Try both of these to get help to sort out your situation before it's too late.

I wish you luck and hope you can come to an amicable arrangement with your wife - you certainly don't want to be in the position of losing contact with your children if your wife fights hard and dirty, but even more important is your children's safety whilst they are growing up.

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