Do I Need "putting Straight" On This Matter?

[Stargazer]

Over Christmas I compiled riddles to put on everyones present so that they had to be solved before knowing which gift belonged to which family member.

On one of the riddles I put "He is camp as all can see, guess who it is? His name is ,,,"

The person for whom it was written looked rather uncomfortable (as did some of the others present) which made me wonder if it was an insult to call someone camp (he is sooo camp actually). Does it infer that that person is gay? I would hate to have upset this lovely person.

[scorpiojo]

Yes it does. Oh dear ...

[jeffa]

Imagine if it had been done to you and you had received a present with a riddle something like "He is so far up himself. Guess who this idiot is..."

[ummmm]

Apologise...

[sherrardk]

Definitely a no no.

[Baldric]

From Chambers,
camp2 colloq, sometimes derog adj 1 said of a man or his behaviour: using mannerisms that are typically associated with women, especially in a deliberate, exaggerated or theatrical way. 2 said of a man: homosexual. 3 theatrical and exaggerated, especially amusingly so. noun camp behaviour or style. verb (camped, camping) intrans to behave in a camp way. camp it up to behave in an exaggerated theatrical way; to overact.

[Ken4155]

You may even have 'outed' him!!

[LazyGun]

Once upon a time the term was a descriptor for being gay.

Times - and terms - are a-changing however, as they are wont to do, and now it has become recognised that one can be camp without being gay.

Common culture lagging behind trending cultural changes as it always does however, that change has not necessarily permeated everywhere, so that inference, that "camp = gay" still holds for many people, and so may well have discomfited your friend.

[boxtops]

I'd be insulted and/or uncomfortable - what did you think it meant?

[lozzer50]

i would have been mortified to receive this ! i guess you did it with the best intentions but it was a little insensitive

[bednobs]

sorry SG but this made me laugh a bit thinking of the uncomforatble silence it must have provoked. If someone had said it about my husband i would have been mortified (along the lines of if you had put "He is fat as all can see, guess who it is? His name is ,,,"

[China Doll]

Yep, you owe them an apology... how did you not see this was insulting?!

[Sqad]

Stargazer........I wouldn't give it another thought.
Today, it is almost impossible not to insult someone for some reason.
Tough........let them get on with it.

[anneasquith]

is he gay ?

[Eve]

I can see people being offended by that, I'd feel a bit put out if someone referred to me as something like "butch".

[boxtops]

sqad, I think you're in a minority - this isn't about PC-ness in general, it's about upsetting a member of the family by an unfortunate personal description.

[Mamyalynne]

It obviously depends on now well you know this person and whether you have ever joked about how 'camp' he is before - seems by his reaction, that is not the case.

An apology will hopefully clear the air.

[Maydup]

Unfortunately you have made a mistake, and where you intended to write an amusing riddle for Christmas, you have have instead thrown a goolie. Send an apology as soon as possible and wish a happy new year.

[askyourgran]

Oh dear what did you think it meant stargazer, surely 'camp' suggests gay mannerisms, speech etc. I would apologise to him for any upset. Do you have many friends left?

[Jeza]

If he's gay then he's gay, maybe the OP has done him a favour or maybe not if the recipient was not ready to be outed.

[jno]

it doesn't necessarily mean gay - but it is pointing the finger at his mannerisms, which isn't really a very nice thing to do. I'd apologise.