My Parents Are Very Impatient

[Jenn044]

I am very happy how I was raised by both of my parents, but the one thing I feel injustice about though is they are both very impatient, especially my dad, he can't stand patience to wait for anything and complaining most of the time, like he can't wait for a internet page to load or for the computer to access internet, says that cooking takes up to much time, how he can't wait for retirement that is in 3 years and keeps on complaining whenever the weather is bad, now I am saying all this because I was raised and told by both of my parents that it is good to learn patience and be patient and that you can't have everything suddenly, now I am used to being very patient with things in life but feel that unfairness that my parents, though taught me to be patient but they themselves aren't, and also with complaining, my dad tells me not to complain but he himself complains on almost anything and it is very annoying when he turns on his negativity, what is a good way to discuss about these matters with my parents?

[fiction-factory]

Thanks them for teaching you to be patient?

[douglas9401]

Do as I say, not as I do.

[bednobs]

so what? Are you old enough to move out? If so, do so. if not, shut it!

[david small]

They have guided you, and cherished you. You can now improve upon their example and become the better person.

[fiction-factory]

^great answer, david. I wish I'd written that

[237SJ]

Everybody has their foibles and most of the time you can't do anything to change that. Don't worry about it

[yogi-bear]

//what is a good way to discuss about these matters with my parents?//

Patiently

I think it's safe to assume that as you get older, in certain people, their patience threshold tends to diminish over the said years.....internet loading slowly, cooking takes too much time to cook it and only 5 minutes to eat it etc....they are your parents and, as you say, very happy with how they raised you....everybody complains about something, no matter what age they are so, to quote our resident AB quack, Sqad.... no big deal, monitor the situation and see what happens.

I'd like to sort of complain that my wife of 25 years is currently in the kitchen making a cake, 'singing' ( and I use the term very loosely) along to Rita Ora's 'Anywhere' amongst other tunes... ......do I complain?....nope, as long as she's happy, I am too......now, where are those ear muffs :-)

[237SJ]

Bednobs - "If so, do so. If not, shut it" Forgive me but this is something I have often wanted to ask. Am I right in thinking that you work/have worked in palliative care? If so, why are you so blunt? If I was dying I would want someone around me who was tactful and caring. Were you working in admin?

[woofgang]

I think bedknobs has a point. Can I ask how old you are?

[bednobs]

yes, i used to wok as a macmillan nurse and at the hospice.
I can't really recall a single time that i told a patient to shut it tho :)

[Neveracrossword]

On an earlier question, the OP mentioned that she was almost 27.

[woofgang]

I didn't work in specialist palliative care but did work in the NHS with people with alzheimers, also with people who were dying and with their families. I have never been brusque with a patient and only a couple of times with a relative because it was needed, but have spoken my mind to incompetent staff on a few occasions.

[woofgang]

oh well in that case move out then.

[bednobs]

if the op is 27, the parents are likely to be in their 50s or over. You can't change people in their 50s - they have had half a decade of being like they are. Sitting down and Pointing out their faults (as you see them) cannot be at all helpful surely? How would you like it if they sat you down to list all your faults?

[woofgang]

oh yes, just read other question....definitely move out

[yogi-bear]

Bednobs is spot on....I'm 52 this April and as stubborn as a mule.....I can be influenced though by the promise of sex, money, massage, ginger nut biscuits, followed by more sex. :-)

[Togo]

Jenn this is their final gift to you. Showing to you that as we age our cherished faculties do indeed wane. It is now time for you to exhibit some of the patience and understanding that you have benefited from, and indeed are able to recognise and appreciate. Look inwards for your answer to this conundrum...... the answer is within you. Learn to be as understanding as they once were. If you get half way there you are qualified to complain at will. :))

[pastafreak]

Mikey...that's a bit rude!

[MallyJ]

Whilst you obviously love your parents and respect them there surely is no reason for you to still be living with them at your age. Parents can be irritating as we get older and develop our own way of doing things so it is good to have your own space. Particularly good , in my opinion , to have time away from parents before you marry so that you can please yourself. You will not find your parents so annoying if you do...and if they annoy you you can simply go home to your place.